One Man's Experience with IVF: Masculinity and Healing
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Cuzzin Justin on IVF: Men, Grief, and the Intentional Path to Fatherhood
Host Andy Grant interviews entrepreneur and podcast host Justin “Cuzzin Justin” Abrams about his six-year IVF journey, emphasizing that infertility and pregnancy loss affect men too. Justin describes feeling pressure to be strong and hide emotions, the emasculating sense of having little role beyond supporting his wife Tara, and how the medical process felt “sterile,” ambiguous, and businesslike. After years in an “unexplainable” category, they learned Tara had endometriosis, following multiple failures and miscarriages. Justin discusses trauma from the uncertainty, private grief, faith/spirituality, and coping through suppression and solitary “walkabouts,” while noting his cousin Todd was his main confidant.
Justin explains their determination to build a family by any means, the desire to continue his family name, and their plan to end doctor-assisted attempts by August. He advises supporters to ask needs-based questions and stresses there’s no playbook—just keep going.
00:00 Men in IVF Too
00:18 Meet Cousin Justin
01:08 Beyond the Roles
02:57 Legacy and Divorce Wakeup
05:37 IVF as Uncontrollable Creation
07:46 Unexplained Infertility Years
10:29 Family Name Pressure
13:59 Emasculating Sterile Traumatic
19:51 Trauma and Fear of Loss
23:47 Why Keep Trying
26:21 Manhood and Testing Results
27:31 Carrying Her Burden
29:14 Atlas Mode and Anger
32:17 Validation and Deflection
35:07 Grief in Different Ways
37:30 Cousin Todd Safe Space
40:08 Marriage Bond and Next Goal
43:12 How to Support Men
46:46 Talking to Kids About IVF
49:10 No Playbook Keep Going
51:00 Final Reflections and Invite
Connect with Justin
Justin Abrams — https://cuzzinjustin.com/
LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/cuzzinjustin/
Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/cuzzinjustin/
Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/cuzzinjustin24Resources
Podcast — Strictly From Nowhere
Connect with Andy:
Join other like-minded men in the Authentic AF Community | https://www.realmenfeel.org/group
Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrant
Andy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!
Real Men Feel | https://realmenfeel.org
YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel
#RealMenFeel ep 417
Co-Founder, CEO and Podcast Host
I'm Justin Abrams, though anyone who really knows me calls me CuzzinJustin. It has been my nickname since childhood and it stuck because I believe that, in some way, I am everyone's cousin. Collapsing the distance between people is the whole job.
I'm a Long Island native, a husband, and a dad. I'm the Cofounder and CEO of Cause of a Kind, a full stack, full service, onshore and in house product and web studio where we help cool people build great products. I cohost the Strictly From Nowhere podcast with Mike Rispoli, my business partner and my friend since we met on a rock climbing wall at fifteen. I also run Long Island Technologists, a grassroots community of more than 300 builders who show up for each other.
Before this, I spent 15 years in B2B SaaS, customer success, and enterprise SEO, consulting for brands like Marriott, Disney, Amazon, Salesforce, and Marvel. That work taught me how to translate complicated technology into plain language for the people who actually have to make the decision.
When I'm not building, I'm outside. Mountains, surf, snow, trails, and the occasional round of golf.
Forward to Extraordinary.
