The Evolution from Prince to King with Justin Nault

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Hello and welcome to Real Men
Feel.

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I'm your host, author, coach and
healer, Andy Grant.

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You can visit theandygrant.com
to learn more about me.

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Real Men Feel reminds men that
they're human beings and they

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have the right to experience and
express all of their emotions.

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We have conversations that most
men are not having, but that all

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men can benefit from.
My guest today is Justin Nalt.

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Justin Nalt is the visionary
founder of Personal Evolution

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Coaching in Clovis, a
transformative health movement

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dedicated to empowering
individuals to heal the

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metabolisms and achieve
sustainable Wellness through

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holistic nutrition and lifestyle
practices.

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Justin is also the creator of
King Versus Prince, a

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revolutionary program designed
to help men evolve from

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reactive, ego driven behaviors
into a mature, grounded state

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known as King Energy.
We discussed the problems of men

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living as adolescents, the
damage of emotional suppression,

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powerful tools to improve your
life like mirror work, somatic

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therapy, and radical honesty.
Justin also shares his how to

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stop hiding exercise one thing
he wishes more menu and the

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purpose of life.
Let's do it.

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Welcome to room and Field,
Justin.

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Thank you so much for having me
man, I'm excited to be here.

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You do a lot of things.
So I know you're an

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entrepreneur, an influencer, a
coach, a certified nutrition

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therapist.
They are a sports and fitness

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enthusiast and nutrition
specialist with fitness and

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nutrition and sports and all
these things.

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But you have a program you call
King versus Prince that really

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got my attention.
And you know, I first of all, it

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sounds being a Prince.
That sounds pretty cool.

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Like so but but so tell me the
difference of what it means to

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you to be a Prince versus being
a king.

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Yeah, it's really just a matter
of on a, on a spiritual level

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and a personal development
level.

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Are you living as an adolescent
or are you living as a mature

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adult?
So what ends up happening in my

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work is, you know, it it's it's
not dependent on age, right?

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I meet Princess who are 55 years
old and I meet kings who are 25

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years old.
It's really just a matter of, of

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the direction their life has
gone, their own unique

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experiences, how they were
raised, the masculine, feminine

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dynamics that existed within
their household, whether they

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had a father figure who was a
king or a Prince, you know, and

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I mean, I say unfortunately, but
you know, everything is perfect

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and the universe is existing
exactly as it should.

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But right now we have a plethora
of full grown men that are that

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are Princess.
And honestly, it's really by no

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fault of their own.
It's just the lack of example

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that has been set.
OK, so the developing to a

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Prince or is every young boy a
Prince automatically or is there

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some progression to reach Prince
energy to begin with?

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And but then we're we're men
keep going.

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Yeah, for sure.
And I mean, it's, it's tricky

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because, you know, I like most
people, I came up in the public

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education system like I went to
preschool and then I went to

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kindergarten and straight
through public school and then I

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went to ended up going to
college and, and doing the whole

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college thing and all that.
And there's just so much

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programming that is authority
based, right?

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A lot of this is, is based on
the perception of authority.

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So what ends up happening is our
whole lives we're raised by a

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quote UN quote authority.
When you're first born, it's

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your parents.
And then it may be the preschool

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teacher or a babysitter or your
aunts and uncles or grandma,

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grandpa, whoever.
And we really live in a society

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where we hear these terms like
big boys don't cry, stop crying,

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or I'll give you something to
cry about.

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Or even girls now it's like,
well, you're a big girl and you

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can do whatever the boys do and
big girls don't cry.

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And all this this messaging that
our emotional experience is

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unacceptable and needs to be
suppressed.

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The fastest way to create a
Prince is to teach them that

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some of their emotions are bad
and some of their emotions are

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good because the distinct
feature.

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The difference between a king
and a Prince, especially in

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romantic relationship as an
adult, is your capacity to

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accept your partner's emotional
experience without labeling it

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good, bad, right, wrong, or
needing to fix it right the the

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very cliche thing men try to fix
their women's problems when the

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woman just wants to be heard.
We were all raised as children

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and the authority figures in our
lives taught us that some

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emotions are good and some
emotions are bad, which leads to

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Jungian depth psychology of the
things that get you more love

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end up in your ego, the things
that get you less love end up in

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your shadow.
So emotions end up this really

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shadowy thing, and what you end
up with is very fragile men who

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are very uncomfortable with
emotional experiences.

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And that's really the
distinguishing factor to me

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between a king and a Prince.
Can a king stand in his own

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emotional experience and
understand that another person's

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emotional experience has nothing
to do with him?

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Even if they're mad at him, it
has nothing to do with them.

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It's their own emotional
experience.

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Can I hold my partner, my
fiance, right?

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Can I hold her in her emotional
experience without thinking that

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it says something about me, or
it has to do with my ego or I've

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done something wrong or I'm bad?
It's a fragility of an

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adolescent way of being in your
own mind.

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There's a an adult man living in
the Prince energy imagine it

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must take some level of
awareness.

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I, I, I am, you know, are some
Princess.

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Just this is life and I'm fine
with it and I'm not looking to

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change.
Whereas others are kind of aware

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of their own struggle.
Yeah, absolutely.

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I mean, for me, right, I was, I
was a professional musician for

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15 years and I did 300 shows a
year.

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I had a network reality TV show
by the time I was 25 years old.

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I mean, I was literally a guy
getting panties thrown at him on

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stage, you know, in my early
20s.

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And as a result of that, it's,
it's almost like the way like

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porn impacts men now as it's
like if things like that are too

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easy and don't require any
amount of like pursuit or

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understanding the complexities
of, of the feminine or anything.

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When things come too easily, you
end up in this sort of fragile

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place.
So for me, I thought I was very

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masculine.
I'm the rock star, I'm Mr.

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Rock'n'roll, girls want me.
Everything's amazing.

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And I was also like I grew up.
I come from a very violent

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place.
There's a lot of like tough

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kindness in my experience, which
is why I got into martial arts

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and jiu jitsu and all these
things.

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But it was that too.
It was like, I'm a tough guy,

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I'm a rock star up on stage.
I get all the ladies.

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I must be masculine or like men
love to say and a man in that

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position like you're a living
the dream, you know.

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But I actually was was deeply
unfulfilled in that.

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And I ended up, you know, quite,
quite sad and the position quite

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burnt out, emptiness in
relationships.

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And I was drinking six nights a
week.

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You know, the last 10 years of
my music career, I was like

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drinking six nights a week.
And it's.

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So to answer your question, I
don't think that I was

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consciously aware that I was
living in Prince energy.

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But when I really took a step
back and looked at the way my

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life was going, I didn't like
what I saw.

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And I kind of saw the writing on
the wall that this wasn't going

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to go good.
So I think that the people that

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are living in their Prince
energy and are unaware of it

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tend to sort of settle into a
status quo sort of mediocrity.

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And I don't mean that in terms
of monetary success, right?

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Because I, I, I work almost
exclusively, a lot of the men's

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work I do is, is with
entrepreneurs.

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I mean, I've met guys that have
10s of millions of dollars

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liquid sitting in the bank and
they are deeply dissatisfied and

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deeply living in their Prince
energy.

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But they were crushing it,
right?

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So they're getting what I call
social cookies from society.

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Everyone's telling them how
great they are, so the internal

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experience is kind of hard to
suss out because, again, we've

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been taught to suppress our
emotional experience.

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So I was living in Prince
Energy, successful on paper,

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successful in the music
industry, and I'd done talk

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therapy and stuff.
It wasn't until I actually found

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a somatic coach that helped me
do somatic work with my body and

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they started accessing my
emotions and realizing the depth

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of disconnection I was feeling
with the feminine, the depth of

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unhappiness I was feeling.
I didn't feel a lot of purpose

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or or passion in what I was
doing for a career in these

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things.
I think you can become aware of

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it, but I definitely think most
men who are in their Prince

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energy are unaware of it until
life events force them to be

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aware of it.
You know, sometimes we get guys

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that have been married and
divorced three times and every

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relationship ended the same way
and still in their mind they

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have a story.
Just like all women are the

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same.
It's the woman's problem and

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they never come to that
realization.

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So I guess it depends on the
life events whether you're going

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to have a spotlight shown on it
or not.

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So I'm glad at least at some
point of some period of time

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while you were living the dream,
you did enjoy it.

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For sure, the first few years of
my 20s, I'm living in Nashville,

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TN and one of the most popular
bars.

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And then when I got the reality
TV show I was on, ABCI, was 25

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years old.
I was getting flown out to Vegas

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and LA and stuff and I'm like,
what is happening?

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It was crazy.
But I mean, yeah, it it was it

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was it was an amazing
experience.

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Yeah, I'm very grateful for it.
Cool.

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So, so then what happened in
your life to make you step back

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and say, you know, I need to
develop my own masculinity or

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whatever you called it at that
at that point, knowing something

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needed to change?
Yeah, a few things.

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I mean, 1, I had three
relationships.

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I I used the term 3 married and
divorced three times.

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For me, it was just committed
romantic relationships.

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It felt like I was dating the
clone of the same person.

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They all ended right at the 2
1/2 year mark.

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It was like two year mark,
things start getting rocky and

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then we do this on again, off
again, toxic thing for six

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months.
And I'm like, wait a minute,

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I've done this three Times Now
with three different people, you

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know, and I, I can't remember
where I heard this, which is one

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of my favorite little stories of
all time is like it, If you

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leave your house in the morning
and you come home at night, and

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that day you met one asshole,
you probably just met an

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asshole.
But if you go out every day and

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every single person you meet is
an asshole, you're the asshole,

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You know, So at some point I had
to look at this.

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The common denominator here
appears to be me.

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And I can't just keep telling
the story that all women are the

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same.
So that happened.

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I was getting pretty burnt out
with the music industry.

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This is about 3-4 years after
I'd done reality TV, which was

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kind of a hellish experience,
honestly.

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And then I was always into very,
very into fitness.

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Not so much into nutrition, but
I was a boxer.

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I did every every form of
CrossFit, jujitsu, every form of

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fitness you can imagine.
But I didn't know much about

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nutrition and that this is kind
of a sidebar here, but my niece

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was born terminally disabled.
She was having over 300 seizures

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a day and she got put on a
ketogenic diet.

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She was put in the pediatric
ICU.

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They they installed AG tube in
her stomach and feed her through

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AG tube.
That was how I learned about the

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ketogenic diet and sort of one
horrors of mainstream medical

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system and to the power of
nutrition.

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Like, wait, you put kids on a
keto diet and you can stop their

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seizures.
There's way more to nutrition

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than six pack abs, clearly.
What is this?

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And that was when I went into
the depth of study.

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I started studying biochemistry,
biology, human metabolism as

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much as I could to learn about
these things.

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And through that, it forced me
to look at my music career and

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I'm like, I'm drunk six nights a
week and I'm helping other

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people get hammered drunk and
forget about life for a while,

228
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as they say in the piano man
song, right?

229
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And I'm like, I'm part of this
kind of toxic thing.

230
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And I'm going to bed at 6:00 in
the morning.

231
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I'm on stage till 3:00 AM.
Like, what is this thing?

232
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I'm feeling quite unfulfilled.
And at this point I was single

233
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and my my momentum relationships
have failed.

234
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:58,920
So I just started like really
looking around and, and what

235
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:00,680
what's happening here.
And I was talking to a talk

236
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:03,560
therapist at the time, but I
felt like talk therapy was just

237
00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:05,960
like, OK, yeah, we talked about
my mom and my dad, my childhood

238
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:07,320
thing.
I have a lot of awareness.

239
00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:09,560
What's the action in the
opposite direction?

240
00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:13,920
How can I embody this action?
And I, I'm certainly not saying

241
00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:16,160
this is right for everyone or
everyone should do this or

242
00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:19,080
anyone should take my journey.
But I, I ended up researching

243
00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:20,840
for about a year and a half
before I did this.

244
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But I went down to Peru and I
had my first psychedelic

245
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,480
experience, which was 4
ayahuasca ceremonies in the

246
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:29,440
jungle over 8 days.
And that was transformative for

247
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me.
And I came back and I was kind

248
00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:34,760
of able to see my own BS in the
mirror of like, oh, turns out

249
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:38,480
it's always been me.
And I just started rethinking

250
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,280
how do I want my life to look?
I, how do I want my health to

251
00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:44,040
be, you know, do I want to be
going to bed at 6:00 AM twenty

252
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:45,560
years from now?
Am I going to stay in this music

253
00:11:45,560 --> 00:11:49,280
industry?
And I also was very fortunate at

254
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:53,080
that time to end up spending
some time with some of the

255
00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:57,160
biggest 90s bands to ever exist
at Tonic, Goo Goo Dolls,

256
00:11:57,160 --> 00:12:01,520
Collective Soul, Third Eye Blind
and meeting all these guys and

257
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,080
the stories of them, You know,
at this point, they're now like

258
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all in their mid 50s and I got
to learn their stories of failed

259
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,320
marriages and alcohol abuse and
they're still on the road all

260
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the time and all this stuff.
And I, it just, everything came

261
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,720
together as like the universe
handed me this gift of like,

262
00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,400
hey, man, here's the writing on
the wall.

263
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,120
This is what it's like.
I got to look in a crystal ball.

264
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,920
Yeah, like, some of these guys
were #1 songs for two years on

265
00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:27,080
the radio, selling out stadiums,
making 10s of millions of

266
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,320
dollars.
And I'm seeing them, like, at a

267
00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:31,760
County Fair playing for 200
people and, like, living in a

268
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tour bus.
And I was like, oh, OK.

269
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,120
And so just everything came
together all at once.

270
00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:39,360
And I, I heavily started
focusing not just on nutrition

271
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:42,480
and fitness, but real health and
happiness.

272
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:44,640
How do I achieve that?
That's amazing.

273
00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:47,320
So well, first I want to ask,
how was your niece?

274
00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:49,440
Now how, how, how was her story
turn out?

275
00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:52,520
Yeah, it's a very, it's, it's
the most common question I get.

276
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:57,560
1 I actually ended up making a
baby formula for her because I

277
00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:59,280
found out the one they were
giving her in the hospital was

278
00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:00,720
toxic.
It was full of seed oils and

279
00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:02,080
artificial ingredients and
stuff.

280
00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:05,520
So I made a baby formula for her
in my kitchen out of Paleo super

281
00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:07,800
foods.
And then I ended up adding much

282
00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:10,120
collagen protein to it and
selling it to cross fitters.

283
00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:12,440
And that's how I got into
e-commerce and started selling

284
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,000
physical products.
But Savannah's life expectancy

285
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:17,480
was less than three years.
She's deemed terminally

286
00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,280
disabled.
We eventually found out it was

287
00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:23,840
something called KCNQ 2.
She was one of 96 living cases

288
00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:28,080
in the world at the time, and
only one had ever lived into

289
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:31,600
adulthood.
So Savannah is now 10, which is

290
00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,280
like, astonishing.
I mean, she's more than tripled

291
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:37,720
her life expectancy.
Unfortunately, they have a nurse

292
00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:40,440
that lives in their home 50
hours a week and takes care of

293
00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:42,280
her.
She's in a wheelchair.

294
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:45,120
There's no brain function.
She doesn't really know her name

295
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:46,680
or anything.
Her eyes kind of dart around.

296
00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:50,200
She's still fed through AG tube.
So she's here, she's she's

297
00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:53,480
existing, you know, But it's a
pretty, pretty tough experience

298
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:57,600
to witness.
Yeah, I, I, I, I can't imagine

299
00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:00,760
seeing a loved one go to go
through something like that.

300
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:04,360
The, the for Savannah or her
parents and the entire family.

301
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:09,240
So, so a good few for, you know,
turning a, a, a tragedy into a

302
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:12,000
blessing for your personal path
and then how much you've

303
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,680
impacted other people too.
Yeah, thank you.

304
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:16,760
I, I love to say there is a
silver lining in it.

305
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,520
It's like, I mean, I, I hate
that she's gone through this,

306
00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:23,760
but she is directly responsible
for, I mean, millions of people

307
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:25,040
learning about their
metabolisms.

308
00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:26,320
Yeah, Yeah.
Great.

309
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:28,440
So, I mean, she's a, she's a
teacher.

310
00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:30,880
Yeah.
Absolutely, Absolutely.

311
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:35,360
So to get back to the Prince
versus king, besides the

312
00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:40,000
emotional stuffing that that
most men are taught, is there

313
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:44,080
another common issue or
something that used to be healed

314
00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:47,280
between the the most Mormon, the
most men you see between between

315
00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:49,840
Prince and king?
For sure, the the the biggest

316
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:52,920
thing, the the core principle of
everything that I teach, that is

317
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,000
the most important thing, even
beyond the emotional

318
00:14:55,000 --> 00:15:00,920
intelligence, is living a
philosophy of radical honesty in

319
00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:03,120
every moment.
And what I mean by that is the

320
00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:08,080
best visual I can give somebody
for encompassing Prince energy

321
00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:12,560
is there's there's a mom and a
mom is in the kitchen and she

322
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:15,080
just baked a lovely chocolate
cake and it's sitting on the

323
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:18,320
island and the telephone rings
and she's got to take a call.

324
00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:19,800
She's going to go upstairs for
some reason.

325
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,960
And she says to little Johnny or
he's five years old little boy.

326
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:27,400
She says, I got to go upstairs.
Don't touch the cake comes back

327
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:29,760
down 20 minutes later.
The kids face is full of cake.

328
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,840
There's cake all over his hands.
There's chocolate on the walls.

329
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,960
The cake is gone.
And mom looks at the sun and

330
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,400
says, did you eat the chocolate
cake?

331
00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:38,760
And he looks her dead in the
eyes and says, no, that's Prince

332
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,600
energy.
It's a fear of loss of love.

333
00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:46,440
It is a suppressing of the
emotional experience, but it is

334
00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:51,960
also intentional hiding of self.
So one of the very first things

335
00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:56,920
I do with men that work with me
is a an exercise called How to

336
00:15:56,920 --> 00:16:00,520
Stop Hiding.
And we actually map this out

337
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:03,040
over about two weeks.
And I try to just put it in

338
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,880
their awareness and we're
writing down and there's all

339
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:07,840
these prompts that walk them
through it and give them very

340
00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:09,840
detailed step by step.
Here's how to get your brain

341
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:12,840
thinking in this direction.
But we're looking for every nook

342
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:16,240
and cranny in your life where
you're either outright lying or

343
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:19,360
withholding, which is simply not
telling the whole truth because

344
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:21,200
you're afraid to hurt someone
else's feelings or you're afraid

345
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:22,640
somebody won't accept you or
whatever.

346
00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:26,040
And we don't realize how
programmed this is in us in

347
00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:28,640
society.
You know, like if I, if my dog

348
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,760
just died and I'm having a
terrible day and I go to

349
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:32,640
Starbucks and the barista's
like, hey, how you doing?

350
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:35,000
Almost guaranteed I'm going to
be like, great, how are you?

351
00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:38,840
You know, we don't understand.
And it seems so silly and people

352
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:40,520
are like, oh, come on, dude.
Like I'm not going to be honest

353
00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:44,440
with the barista or whatever.
I'm like, but imagining what

354
00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,560
your life would be like if you
were capable of saying like, you

355
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,560
know what, man?
I'm, I'm having a really, I'm

356
00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,320
having a really tough one,
having a tough day.

357
00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:52,840
Thank you for asking.
I appreciate it.

358
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:55,280
I really hope you're doing well.
I'd like to just place my order

359
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,760
like there's something to that.
And for anyone listening to

360
00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:02,760
this, like when I say that and I
act that out for you, I get

361
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:06,520
goosebumps because our whole
lives we are taught to do the

362
00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:08,839
exact opposite.
And then you get into dating and

363
00:17:08,839 --> 00:17:12,200
Tinder and social media, just
always putting your best face

364
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:13,920
forward, right?
You got to look the best.

365
00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:16,920
You got to sound the best.
Every ROM com you ever watch on

366
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:20,920
TV is only funny and only exists
because of the dishonesty

367
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:23,839
riddled throughout the entire
script of people just lying and

368
00:17:23,839 --> 00:17:25,920
hiding from one another and
causing all these problems.

369
00:17:26,480 --> 00:17:29,400
So when you graduate in the king
energy, just fair warning it's

370
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:31,320
way less fun to watch TV and
movies.

371
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,320
You're like this is stupid why
don't they just tell each other

372
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:34,960
the truth?
This whole movie would be over

373
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:38,040
in 5 minutes you know?
But that's the biggest thing is,

374
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:41,520
is dishonesty is a happiness
killer.

375
00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,920
Is king versus Prince?
Is this online?

376
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:46,360
Is it a group?
Is it one-on-one?

377
00:17:46,360 --> 00:17:47,800
Is it in person?
How how how did?

378
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,840
How are the logistics of this
program?

379
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:53,280
Yeah, King versus Prince
actually started as an online

380
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:56,480
course that still exists, which
was helping men raise their

381
00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:59,200
testosterone levels naturally
with no substances.

382
00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:04,640
And it was a way for me to kind
of Trojan horse them of like,

383
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:07,400
you're living in this misaligned
way that is really problematic.

384
00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:10,000
And once we get you to a place
of more self love and self

385
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,760
acceptance, then you'll make
better decisions to make your

386
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:15,200
health and Wellness better.
That still exists as a product,

387
00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:17,560
as a as an offering online
course.

388
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:20,160
King versus Prince right now is
directly one-on-one with me.

389
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:22,800
And is it in person or virtual
or both?

390
00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:25,960
Both if I have clients that are
here in Austin, which is great,

391
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:28,800
and I have specific locations
that we meet up at at Austin and

392
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:30,880
then anyone who wants to do
coaching remotely, we just do it

393
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,480
over Zoom.
For any man that you know, maybe

394
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,760
isn't really to jump into a
one-on-one coaching relationship

395
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:39,040
with somebody, but they they're
they're noticing that lack of

396
00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:41,040
meaning, fulfillment purpose in
their life.

397
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:44,120
Do you have any things that they
could they could try to you know

398
00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:46,560
what, what's 1 simple step that
that a man could take to try to

399
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:50,080
start improving his life?
Yeah, I mean, one, go ahead and

400
00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:53,560
even without the prompts, you
can just, or I'm happy to share

401
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:54,520
a link with you if you want me
to.

402
00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:58,280
But I would just try the how to
stop hiding exercise, which is

403
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:02,520
just taking stock of every place
in your life in which you are

404
00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:05,960
hiding or lying or withholding
and go through the most

405
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,960
significant relationships in
your family.

406
00:19:08,240 --> 00:19:11,200
If you're really close with your
dad, try to pick apart the

407
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,320
places where you're not telling
the whole truth to your dad.

408
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:16,080
If you're really close with your
brother, your Co worker, your

409
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:18,440
boss, your romantic partner,
whoever it is, the people that

410
00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:21,280
you really see the most and you
care about the relationship more

411
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,000
than anything, those are the
best places to start because

412
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,080
it's usually where you'll find
the most safety, where these are

413
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:29,880
people you can actually go back
to and say, hey, listen, six

414
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,960
months ago I told you this thing
and it and it wasn't true and

415
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,200
I'm sorry and I was really
scared and here's where I was

416
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:36,520
coming from.
And I hope you can forgive me

417
00:19:36,840 --> 00:19:39,720
kind of choosing the the safest
places for you to start to

418
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:42,480
practice radical honesty.
I think that's extremely

419
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:45,960
beneficial for anybody.
And then in terms of easy to

420
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:50,040
access resources, especially if
you're in relationship or have

421
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:52,480
been in a romantic relationship.
And I'm, I'm assuming

422
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:56,200
heterosexual men right now, but
also masculine, feminine

423
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,800
dynamics play out regardless of
gender in every single romantic

424
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:00,960
relationship.
So there's a book by GS

425
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:04,120
Youngblood called The Masculine
in Relationship, and I would

426
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,840
probably start there.
GS is a really great guy.

427
00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:07,760
I've worked with him directly.
I know him very well.

428
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:09,520
I know his teachings very well.
And.

429
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,000
He's been on the show, so I'll
link.

430
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,120
I'll link to that show for those
for people.

431
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,280
Yeah, yeah, that's a great place
to start.

432
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,640
Great.
IA lot of men that that have

433
00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:20,160
never even heard the term
masculine, feminine dynamics.

434
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,760
They're they'll read that book.
Oh, man, this feels like he's

435
00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:26,720
talking about me and my partner.
It's just it's so common.

436
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:27,560
Yeah.
Cool.

437
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:31,120
And you, you mentioned self love
already too.

438
00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:34,920
And I know my own journey when
you love myself was probably the

439
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:38,080
the biggest single impactful
thing I can point to.

440
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:42,080
But is any tips for how how a
man that perhaps even that term

441
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:43,480
just puts him off?
Like how?

442
00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:46,000
How can a man start to to
nurture any self love?

443
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,400
Yeah, What's interesting with
men is it sometimes it's easier

444
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:51,600
for us to love other than it is
to love self.

445
00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:54,720
But then as you get deeper into
love with other, you start to

446
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:58,080
realize the amount that if you
don't have a lot of self love,

447
00:20:58,360 --> 00:20:59,840
you'll start to pick other
people apart.

448
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:02,920
Especially in the dating world.
It's like, is she quite pretty

449
00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:04,800
enough?
Is she quite smart enough?

450
00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:06,680
She hasn't travelled as much as
I have.

451
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:07,800
Are we going to have anything in
common?

452
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,360
You know what I mean?
Like that kind of thing, the

453
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:12,840
nitpicking.
So with there's another exercise

454
00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:15,440
that I get people called Daily
Mirror work and I can teach you

455
00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:19,120
Daily Mirror work right here.
And for men, it probably sounds

456
00:21:19,120 --> 00:21:21,640
a little cheese ball and it
probably makes you feel really

457
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,200
uncomfortable.
But trust me, try this even for

458
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,120
10 days every single day and
you'll see what happens.

459
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,920
It's, and I actually I recommend
men do it in the least amount of

460
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:31,800
clothing possible.
So get out of the shower or

461
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:33,960
whatever 'cause we, we can do
somebody love here as well.

462
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,480
If you're struggling with the
way you look and you just get in

463
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:38,960
the mirror and it's looking
yourself in the eyes and saying

464
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:41,760
I love you 10 times and meaning
it.

465
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:43,440
Breathe deeply as much as you
need to.

466
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:47,640
I love you 10 times and then I
move into I'm proud of you for

467
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,200
and we do five.
I'm proud of you for statements.

468
00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:52,800
A different thing every time.
I'm proud of you for doing

469
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:55,200
mirror work today.
I'm proud of you for the way you

470
00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:56,840
handled that conflict with your
partner last night.

471
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:58,960
I'm proud of you.
I try not to make it achievement

472
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:00,240
based.
I'm proud of you for being a

473
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,320
millionaire, right?
Because then we're dealing with

474
00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:05,400
other esteem and external
validation, you know, just

475
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:06,680
finding ways to be proud of
yourself.

476
00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:10,400
And then five statements.
I forgive you for five things

477
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:13,440
you're ready to forgive yourself
for and let go of and then five

478
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:17,760
statements I commit to you.
That and the commitment

479
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:21,160
statements are really important.
I think the biggest bicep curl,

480
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:24,760
the biggest Rep for gaining self
love is keeping commitments to

481
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,840
self.
So don't go huge and lofty here

482
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:29,400
before you're ready for it.
If I have a client that comes to

483
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:32,760
me and they're £350 and type 2
diabetic, I don't want them to

484
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:35,360
say I commit to you that I'm
going to eat perfectly every day

485
00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:37,680
for the next 90 days.
They are going to break that.

486
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:39,200
They're going to let themselves
down and they're going to

487
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,800
diminish self love.
So I may have them say I commit

488
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,680
to you that every morning for
the next three mornings I'm

489
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:46,600
going to start my day with a
glass of water.

490
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,960
That's a big win.
And at day three you get to

491
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:51,880
celebrate because you've set
yourself up for success instead

492
00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:53,920
of failure.
So Daily Mirror work is where I

493
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,880
start people and then over time
helping them.

494
00:22:56,880 --> 00:23:00,120
See, my core belief is that
every single human in your

495
00:23:00,120 --> 00:23:02,840
reality is a mirror for your
internal state.

496
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,480
So right now I'm talking to a
mirror.

497
00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:09,200
I'm talking to myself, but I've
named this mirror Andy, and I'm

498
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:11,720
going to learn things through
the unique consciousness

499
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:14,400
experience of interacting with
this particular mirror.

500
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:18,520
So men that struggle to give
themselves love or feel very

501
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:21,840
uncomfortable in mirror work
just start to notice.

502
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:25,480
Bring awareness in your mind to
when you're out in the world and

503
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:29,480
you're judging other people and
you see some guy who's, you

504
00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:32,320
know, overweight in sweatpants
at the grocery store and you're

505
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:34,560
like, oh, I can't believe he's
out here in his sweatpants and

506
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:36,840
just pause, right?
Why does it matter?

507
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:41,320
He's in sweatpants.
So if you can give unconditional

508
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:46,000
love to other, it's just doing
Jedi level mirror work because

509
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,200
the mirror is also you.
There's the mirror in your

510
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:50,520
bathroom, and there's the mirror
of your reality.

511
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:53,080
So one of the fastest ways to
build up self love in my

512
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:55,200
opinion, is to learn just to
catch yourself when you're

513
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:57,560
judging others and just try to
love them for exactly who they

514
00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:58,920
are without needing them to
change.

515
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:01,160
Right, Yeah.
And especially in relationships,

516
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:05,400
nobody, man or woman, human
being, we can't love someone

517
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,120
else fully if we don't love
ourselves.

518
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:09,200
We can't give away something we
don't have.

519
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:10,560
Right.
And I think that's yeah, the,

520
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:12,960
the picking things apart because
like, yeah, I don't love myself.

521
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:15,520
So if no one else is good enough
because I'm not good, though.

522
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:17,240
Exactly.
That's it.

523
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:18,640
Your love of self is
conditional.

524
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:21,160
Right.
And I want to give a shadow from

525
00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:23,080
mirror work.
I I forgot about this.

526
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:24,440
Actually, it used to be a daily
practice.

527
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,000
I was doing this like 20 years
ago.

528
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:29,920
Learned it from Louise Hay at a
time I was depressed, suicidal.

529
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:31,320
I'm a survivor of multiple
attempts.

530
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,240
I could not even hold my eyes.
I couldn't look at myself in the

531
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:36,240
face like I've never Oh my God,
I want to look at me.

532
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:39,120
I'm awful.
So anyone who wants to try this,

533
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:42,200
if you hit in that much
resistance, it's OK, right.

534
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:46,880
To to get to the place where I
could say I love you, Andy, I

535
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:50,360
had to 1st hate.
I looked at myself and vent and

536
00:24:50,360 --> 00:24:53,120
said, you fucking suck, you're
an asshole, you do everything

537
00:24:53,120 --> 00:24:55,520
wrong.
And until I'm bawling and then I

538
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:58,000
could say I love you.
I get it.

539
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:01,200
I've released that.
So it's just, it's a, a radical

540
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,200
twist on, on what you're talking
about.

541
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:07,040
But again, if, if you're field
drawn to, to ripping yourself

542
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:09,520
apart, go there so that you can
get through it.

543
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:12,400
Like don't make it a practice of
disparaging yourself in the

544
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:14,560
mirror everyday.
But if, if that's the sort of

545
00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:16,760
roadblock someone hits, I just
want like, that's what I hit.

546
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:20,320
So it's OK.
Oh 100% I love that you went

547
00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:24,080
there because I had done talk
therapy for about 5 years and

548
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:26,040
around that time I had found
psychedelics and stuff but it

549
00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:29,560
was when I I found a coach that
taught me somatic work, which is

550
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:30,720
really what you're talking
about.

551
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:35,040
I had my first somatic session
with him and I cried so hard and

552
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:37,320
he got me there through the side
door of rage.

553
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:39,720
He's like, hey, man, you're a
big tough guy.

554
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:42,520
You're, you know, out here dead
lifting and doing jiu jitsu.

555
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,440
So like, you're very comfortable
with rage.

556
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:47,400
And he just had me go through
this whole process of rage and

557
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:50,040
smashing pillows and screaming.
And before I knew it, I was

558
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:53,000
crying like a baby.
And I couldn't figure out why

559
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,320
what is happening.
So we're full circle now at the

560
00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:58,520
beginning of the conversation of
not suppressing these emotions.

561
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,720
I had, you know, 2830 years,
whatever.

562
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,440
I'm 38 now.
But like of, of repressed

563
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:07,120
emotions.
And once I found that once I

564
00:26:07,120 --> 00:26:10,640
went there, the rage of like,
God, I just hate everything.

565
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,880
It's like the Hoover Dam cracked
open and I just had a wave of

566
00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:18,880
emotions come and sort of free
me from all of this bottled up

567
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:20,600
stuff, which is what you're
experiencing.

568
00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:23,680
And that's why beyond the how to
stop hiding exercise, one of the

569
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,000
first exercises I give men is
called emotional unleashing.

570
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,120
We're doing somatic work like
you're talking about, Like go

571
00:26:29,120 --> 00:26:33,400
there, go to the darkness, live
in it, swim in it, love it, be

572
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,760
grateful for it, and just do
whatever you need to do to move

573
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,560
that stuff.
Yeah, when one of the earliest

574
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:41,080
commuters I've had with a
coaching client and we were both

575
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:44,320
frustrated because he was a he
could logically think and name

576
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:45,520
problems, but wouldn't feel
them.

577
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:48,560
So I finally, I I said go get
that chair.

578
00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,680
There's just a wooden chair in
the room, I said, and smash it.

579
00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:52,080
No, no, no.
And he finally he did.

580
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,200
He breaks it to pieces and then
starts bawling and could really

581
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,840
like the the cork was out.
And I always joked about like,

582
00:26:57,840 --> 00:26:59,960
Oh, I gotta like, I gotta visit
every flew market and just get

583
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:02,960
like a dozens of crappy chairs
to like have this men's workshop

584
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:04,760
everyone smash his furniture to
breakthrough something.

585
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:09,400
But there's a lot to that.
Like, again, men get into their

586
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:11,960
motions through movement, right.
It's but you get it.

587
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:14,600
You'll get a guy to talk much
more easier by going for a walk

588
00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:16,640
then sitting in down and say,
honey, I need to talk to you.

589
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:18,600
That puts the man like, oh, no,
what's wrong?

590
00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,040
And fear of losing love, as you
mentioned earlier, right.

591
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:24,520
But yeah, you got to come in the
side door for for most guys to

592
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:27,520
get them to open up to to get
through a block to break down

593
00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:31,120
some resistance.
But yeah, I'm loving all the

594
00:27:31,120 --> 00:27:35,040
tools you're sharing.
Yeah, man, is is what's one

595
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:36,840
thing that you wish more men
knew?

596
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:44,960
Oh.
That I think the purpose of life

597
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:49,240
is radical, authentic
self-expression.

598
00:27:50,120 --> 00:27:54,360
So all the things that you are
afraid of being judged for that

599
00:27:54,360 --> 00:27:58,160
make you uniquely you are the
biggest gifts that you have to

600
00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:01,360
offer the world.
And it's kind of like, you know,

601
00:28:01,360 --> 00:28:04,040
I know, you know, Internet
marketing, if you're creating an

602
00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:06,120
offer and you're trying to sell
it to the world and they say,

603
00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:08,560
who's this for?
And you say everybody, you don't

604
00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:11,280
have an offer.
You need to niche down to the

605
00:28:11,360 --> 00:28:15,280
specific people that you help.
And this is the same thing with

606
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:19,800
with all humans.
You have a very unique special

607
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:24,120
thing that is only you.
You would there is when I say

608
00:28:24,120 --> 00:28:26,480
that each human is a unique
consciousness experience, Andy

609
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,240
is a unique consciousness
experience that doesn't exist

610
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:30,520
anywhere else in the world.
So the things that make you

611
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:34,720
unique are your greatest gifts.
But if you want everybody to

612
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:37,520
like you, then you're going to
have to suppress some of that.

613
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:39,680
You're not going to be able to
show up in radical authenticity.

614
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:42,560
So I help people see it through
the opposite lens.

615
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:44,960
Like the more you show up in
radical authenticity, you're

616
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,800
just doing a great job of
wedding out the people that

617
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:50,200
aren't meant for you anyway.
You don't want these superficial

618
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:52,400
relationships or the person
doesn't really know you.

619
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:54,200
You're performing for them.
They're performing for you.

620
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,760
You can't be your whole self.
I'd much rather have quality of

621
00:28:57,760 --> 00:28:59,640
relationships over quantity of
relationships.

622
00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:03,000
So finding ways to express
yourself in radical

623
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:04,760
authenticity, which is why I
start with honesty.

624
00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:07,720
I really think that's the
biggest thing is, is I, I think

625
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,040
when I was younger, especially
in my music career, you know,

626
00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,920
trying to literally get the most
downloads and get the most

627
00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:15,080
YouTube videos and get the most
people to love me.

628
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:18,960
I would just chameleon my way
through the world trying to make

629
00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:20,920
everybody like me.
But everybody was liking a

630
00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:22,440
version of me that wasn't really
me.

631
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:24,720
So I had no authentic
connections.

632
00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:27,520
I had no intimacy in connection.
That's the thing.

633
00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,520
I wish that people, I wish
people understood how special

634
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:32,880
their uniqueness is.
Yeah.

635
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:37,560
Yeah, so all of your various
masks had friends, but but you

636
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:39,880
didn't, Justin didn't.
Yeah, 100%.

637
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:42,120
And again, voucher thing you're
sharing here.

638
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:47,840
Growing up, everything I thought
was a weakness and a curse and

639
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:51,440
something horrible about me has
proven to be a a gift, a

640
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:54,120
strength, something I use and
something like other people

641
00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:55,600
applaud me for.
I'm like, really.

642
00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,320
Like, you're right.
Just, you know, for being

643
00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:01,160
emotional, for being vulnerable,
Like, like I am the guy that

644
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:03,480
will tell the barista, yeah, my
dog just died.

645
00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:08,480
It's like today sucks, you know?
And we'll we'll ball in in

646
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:10,600
public and pardon the name of
the show.

647
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,920
Real men feel was like, imagine
that, you know, we come to a

648
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:16,160
time when we see a man in public
sobbing and he go look at that

649
00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:17,040
brave guy.
Wow.

650
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,400
So yeah, I suppose.
Look at that pussy over there,

651
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:20,760
right?
Which is still what it kind of

652
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:22,040
is today for most people, I
think.

653
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:23,880
But dude.
I love that vision.

654
00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:25,480
That's, I love that you said
that.

655
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,840
Like, yeah, that's, that's the
world I want to live in.

656
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:30,640
And, you know, it's funny too,
because I went so deep down the

657
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:32,520
rabbit hole.
I grew up watching Arnold

658
00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,040
Schwarzenegger and Sylvester
Stallone.

659
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,320
I was born in 86, you know,
started lifting weights when I

660
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,240
was 15 and I wanted to be a
boxer.

661
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:40,000
Started, became a boxer when I
was 18.

662
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:43,000
I'm a purple belt in jiu jitsu.
I, I did militia training.

663
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:46,240
I did CrossFit, Olympic lifting.
I learned kettle bells from

664
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:48,840
Strong First and Pavel Satsu,
Celine, like every tough guy

665
00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:50,880
thing you can think of.
I've done it.

666
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:54,320
And it's so now when I'm talking
to men, I find that the the men

667
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:56,600
with the least amount of
training in those places are

668
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:58,640
actually the most fragile and
want to fight the most and want

669
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:02,080
to prove themselves the most.
And I'm like, listen man, I can

670
00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:06,000
kill some people with my bare
hands 100% and I will also cry

671
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,240
my eyes out in public.
I don't care who's around.

672
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,360
If I need to feel, I'm going to
feel.

673
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:12,720
And why does it have to be
binary?

674
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:16,240
Why is one of those things tough
and masculine and one of those

675
00:31:16,240 --> 00:31:19,680
things is weak and feminine?
We need to literally rewrite the

676
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:22,440
definition of what we think
masculinity is.

677
00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:24,440
Because I believe that kings
cry.

678
00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:28,360
Sure yeah to to me like that's
why the the archetypes are part

679
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,040
of the real men feel logo in
front of the image we use and

680
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:34,760
the king is available to step
into every emotion step into

681
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:36,680
every role.
I mean control.

682
00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:39,720
It's not that I deny and think
some part of me is bad.

683
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:43,520
Like no, I'm I am the I'm the
sovereign of my entire

684
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:45,640
experience.
That's that to me.

685
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:47,680
That's what being the king in
your own life means.

686
00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:51,000
Yeah, 100% that that gets to
like Youngie and shadow

687
00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:52,680
integration too.
I, I think a lot of new age

688
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,720
spirituality has this like love
and light, love and light, love

689
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:57,760
and light.
It's like, OK, well shadow work

690
00:31:57,760 --> 00:32:00,960
is we're going to go become
aware of the things that are in

691
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:02,640
our shadow and we're going to
face them.

692
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:04,800
Yeah.
And I'm like no no, shadow

693
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:08,920
integration is you love all the
parts of your shadow as much as

694
00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:12,480
you love the ego self.
Neither 1 is good, bad, right,

695
00:32:12,480 --> 00:32:14,680
wrong, better, worse.
It's like the things that are in

696
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:16,440
your shadow that have been
locked away in a basement.

697
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:19,200
It's not just you shine a
flashlight on them, it's that

698
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,880
you give them the same amount of
love and attention and gratitude

699
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,240
that you give to the parts of
self that are your ego that have

700
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:26,640
made you this bright shiny
person.

701
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:28,920
It's like you're saying you
don't believe king, warrior,

702
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:32,120
lover, or magician is any better
or worse than any of the other

703
00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:34,280
archetypes.
They all have to be fully

704
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:35,920
integrated and fully expressed.
Right.

705
00:32:36,280 --> 00:32:38,760
Yep.
Awesome, man.

706
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:40,400
So I'm going to make this public
because I never know you're

707
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:42,360
going to come back and we're
going to talk more because

708
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:44,320
you'd, I know we've even gone to
all the other things that you

709
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:46,360
also do.
And, and it's such a rich

710
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:49,520
conversation.
And I, I love a guest that, you

711
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:52,280
know, shares their story, shares
how the being of service and

712
00:32:52,280 --> 00:32:54,600
gives concrete things that
people can do today.

713
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:58,640
Yeah, because, you know,
ideally, you know, I guess every

714
00:32:58,640 --> 00:33:00,640
podcast is entertainment at some
level.

715
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:04,280
But I, my goal for women feels
that it's transformative, like

716
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:07,920
you change and improve your life
by, by having, by having guests

717
00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:10,440
like you, Justin.
So again, I, I thank you for

718
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,200
everything you've gone through,
everything you're doing,

719
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:14,280
everything you're going to do.
Yeah.

720
00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:15,720
Man, I think you've got the
opportunity to be here.

721
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:17,320
This is this is great.
I love this conversation.

722
00:33:17,640 --> 00:33:19,360
Cool.
So, So what is the best way for

723
00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:22,360
people to find out more about
you and and how to tap into your

724
00:33:22,360 --> 00:33:24,280
programs and learn about all the
other things you're up to?

725
00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:26,640
Sure, yeah, the best way is
always through social media for

726
00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:29,880
me, and it's just my first and
last name, Justin Nault NAULT

727
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:32,920
Justin Nault official is my
handle everywhere, TikTok,

728
00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:35,000
Instagram, YouTube, all the
places.

729
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:38,600
And it's it's me everywhere.
I run all those social accounts.

730
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:40,280
If you DM me, you're going to be
chatting with me.

731
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:42,800
That's definitely the easiest
way to get in touch with me.

732
00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:46,680
And you know, I would say,
unlike most people that do

733
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:48,880
coaching and things in the
world, like I always want to

734
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:52,000
start my interaction with anyone
who wants to talk to me with a

735
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,720
genuine conversation and
understanding the problem that

736
00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:57,040
it is that they want to solve to
see if I can even help them to

737
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:58,840
begin with.
I'm not just going to I'm the

738
00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:00,000
guy for you.
Let's do the thing.

739
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:01,720
Let's get on a sales call.
I don't play that game.

740
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:05,160
So the best way is to go to
Instagram, shoot me Adm tell me

741
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:06,760
you heard this.
Tell me what you got going on

742
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:10,000
and we'll just get real awesome.
Again, thank you, Justin for

743
00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:11,560
joining us.
Everyone listening, Thank you

744
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:13,199
for joining us.
Wherever you're discovering Real

745
00:34:13,199 --> 00:34:17,040
Men Field, please subscribe,
like, share, share this episode

746
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:19,280
with someone that you know would
benefit from hearing about it.

747
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:21,040
That's the best thing you could
do for someone else.

748
00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:24,040
Go visit Real Men Field at org.
There'll be a blog post with all

749
00:34:24,040 --> 00:34:25,560
the different show notes.
We'll link to all the different

750
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:27,400
exercises and tools that were
mentioned.

751
00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:30,000
And if you're not yet in the
Real Men Field private Facebook

752
00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:31,600
group, maybe you didn't know
what existed.

753
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:35,080
Well, it does.
Just visit realmenfeel.org/group

754
00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:37,199
and you'll be in that group.
We get a little private chest,

755
00:34:37,199 --> 00:34:38,920
get behind the scenes things
going there.

756
00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:42,480
You can always reach out to me
at realmenfeel@gmail.com and

757
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,360
until next time, be good to
yourself.