Hitting Life's Curveballs: Beating Crack Addiction and MS

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So here I am, naked girl, drunk,
crack pipe in my hand.

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I hit the crack.
OK?

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I was like, my God, this is the
only reason why I make money.

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This is the only reason why I'm
here on this planet.

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And it was that, you know, it
was one time.

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And it's like, and everybody,
you know, that's been an addict

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or an alcoholic knows what I'm
talking about.

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I mean, it was that one.
And I was done.

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It, it, it had me and it was
over with, you know, there was

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no fighting it whatsoever.
I I I had no control.

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Hello and welcome to Real Men
Feel.

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I'm your host Andy Grant.
My guest today is Kelly

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Gullridge.
Drafted into professional

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baseball, Kelly went on to play
12 years in the pros.

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But behind that dream, he was
spiraling into crack cocaine

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addiction that nearly destroyed
his life and career.

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In 2006, Kelly hit rock bottom
and show sobriety and got his

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life.
Back.

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But just when things seem
settled down, Kelly faced

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another curveball, the diagnosis
of multiple sclerosis.

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Today, we'll explore what it
takes to overcome addiction,

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rediscover purpose, heal against
the odds, and live fully in

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recovery and redemption.
And if you want to continue

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conversations like this, join my
private online community,

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Authentic AF, at
realmenfield.org/group.

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Now, let's do it.
Hello Kelly, and welcome to Real

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Men Field.
Hey, it's good to be with you,

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Andy.
I'm, I'm happy to be here, man.

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Yeah, I'm happy you're here too.
You've had quite a rich life.

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Let's say I know you, you, you
grew up in a baseball family.

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So let let's go back to the
beginning and and what was it

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like being raised in that
environment?

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He wasn't per SE a professional
ball player, but he's been with

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the Rangers for 40 plus years.
He's kind of the voice of the

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Texas Rangers.
And so, yeah, you know, I, I

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that's, that's the environment I
grew up in.

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We were, I was just talking to
my neighbor about it the other

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day.
Like, you know, it wasn't, you

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know, I I didn't work on cars or
build things or, you know, it

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was, it was baseball.
And and that was great because I

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ended up loving it and, you
know, it, it, it became my life.

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So it, it, it was a good, it, it
was good growing up like that.

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Andy.
Even as a kid, did baseball seem

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to mean more to you than than
friends and brothers or anyone

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else?
As time grew on, as I got older,

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I'd say around the age of 12,
that's when it became it, it

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started becoming more important
than everything.

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And you know, I, I really loved
it.

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And you know, I, I, I, over the
years I've seen like my dad, you

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know, like I said, it's, it's
life for him.

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He, he bleeds blue and red
Ranger blood, you know, and it's

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not, it's not to say he's God,
but it, it, it means a lot to

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him.
And you know, as, as time

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progressed, it became kind of
it, it, it overwhelmed my life

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and it became, it became who I
was, you know, my job and

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everything became who I was.
Because yeah, you were drafted

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out of high school, but you
decided to go to college.

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So what?
What went into that decision?

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Right.
So I got, I got, I got drafted

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at 25th round out of high school
and everybody had been saying I

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was going to go higher and, and
it didn't happen.

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The last thing on earth I wanted
to do was go to college and you

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know, so the, the money wasn't
there.

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And then it was a last minute
decision.

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Like I, I'd been to UT, I'd been
to A&M, other places on official

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visits and Alabama.
I mean, that was, dude, I don't

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want to go to Alabama.
You know, it's, I don't know, it

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just didn't sound very
appealing, But I ended up

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that's, that was the decision I
made.

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It was actually a really good
decision.

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Those were three of the best
years of my life.

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Got to play in the Cosworld
series, and then my junior year

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I got drafted again by the
Minnesota Twins when the 10th

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round, and the money was right
that time.

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So it ended up being a really
great decision going to the

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University of Alabama.
But in the beginning, the last

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thing I wanted to do is go to
college, so.

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What?
What was so off putting about

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the idea of college?
And I want to play pro ball.

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I mean that I wanted to get
going.

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You know, it's that was that's
what I had been bred to do man

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was play professional baseball.
And and it just, it had been put

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on hold for another three years.
So, you know, I had to wait it

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out.
So you're with the Minnesota

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Twins, You're a pro ball player.
Dreams come true.

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So what was the reality?
How did that feel?

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I was great, man.
I, you know, it was, I was where

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I wanted to be.
Everything was going really

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well.
You know, the, the things they

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don't realize, like the, you
know, I've gotten a big signing

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bonus and that money was
partially available.

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It was in a mutual fund, but I
had a card, you know, but at the

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time, that first year with the
Twins, I'm getting paid $850 a

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month.
You're I was in the Midwest

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League.
So the bus that's, we were based

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out of Davenport, IA.
So the bus trips are 810 hours

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and didn't have any friends.
Very lonely living in hotel

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rooms.
I had a girlfriend, but not

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really, you know, and that this
is kind of this is kind of where

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the story starts starts to trail
off.

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But, you know, spent a lot of
time at strip clubs and you want

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to talk about a lonely place,
man, that's, you know, and that

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that's where a lot of my time to
spend.

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So early in your career, were
you playing as much?

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Were you progressing through the
ranks?

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Was where were things going as
quickly as you had hoped?

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Yeah, so, you know, I 2001 was
my first full season, and by the

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end of that season I was #10 on
the prospect list for the

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Minnesota Twins.
So they had me listed out of all

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their minor league players #10
and to preface that, man, you

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know, this is this is where the
story gets kind of crazy.

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So that same year we're in
Lansing, MI, we're playing the

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Lansing lug nuts.
I said things are going great.

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Never really drank a little bit.
Never ever done a drug ever in

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my life.
Right.

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Like I like I said earlier, you
know, I said there was a lot of

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strip clubs and it had been it
had become an art at this point,

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like going to a strip club and
being able to pick up a girl and

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take her home.
It was a lot easier than going

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to a bar.
It was a lot easier than having

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a girlfriend.
That was that was my lifestyle.

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Wasn't everybody's lifestyle,
but it was the way it was the

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way I rolled.
And so one night in Lansing, MI,

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after a game, this about midway
through the 2001 season, go to

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the strip club hanging out.
Girl comes up talking to her and

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she's like, I'm going to take
you home.

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And I said, OK, let's go.
And so, you know, at the end of

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the night, I'm waiting outside.
She comes around front picks me

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up in her car and we go back to
her house.

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Well, you know, I, I grew up in
the Dallas Ford area and I'd

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been around people that have
done cocaine and seen it 100

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times, you know, but I was
inebriated.

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There's a naked girl sitting in
front of me.

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She breaks out a test tube,
cooks the cocaine up in the

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crack and naked girl drunk.
OK, you know, and, and, and

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nobody tell no that, you know,
that all the DARE education,

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George W Bush actually came to
my DARE graduation in elementary

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school, you know, don't do
drugs, right.

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But nobody, nobody really
explained to me the significance

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of it or how powerful a drug is.
It like, you know, I know, I

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didn't know.
You know, I, I, I'm Kelly

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Gulledge.
I'm a professional baseball

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player.
I'm more powerful than that is.

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It's going to take a lot more
than one time to knock me down.

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So here I am, naked girl drunk
crack pipe in my hand.

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I hit the crack, OK, most, I
mean, you know, it's one of

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those things that knocked you
back.

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I was like, my God, this is the
only reason why I make money.

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This is the only reason why I'm
here on this planet.

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And it was that, you know, it
was one time.

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And it's like, and everybody,
you know, that's been an addict

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or an alcoholic knows what I'm
talking about.

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I mean, it was that one.
And I was done.

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It, it, it had me and it was
over with, you know, there was

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no fighting it whatsoever.
I, I, I had no control.

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So that one time led to A7 year
ordeal, man, You know, I was, I

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was addicted to crack cocaine
for seven years.

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And you should always when I
tell this story, you know, it's,

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it's some people laugh, you
know, because I went straight

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from alcohol to crack, man.
There was no, there was no, but

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that's how I am man 100% all the
time, man.

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All in, baby.
So yeah, I was all in with the

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crack man.
Yeah.

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So it, it, it started in O 1 and
I didn't really get sober till O

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6.
And, you know, there was yeah.

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I don't want to get into many
war stories, but I'll tell I I

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can tell a couple things along
the way.

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You know, that it's I'm grateful
to be here today.

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I mean, there was a there was a
night in Juarez, Mexico, where I

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probably should have never been
able to come home.

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I, I got, got out of, went over
to Juarez, smoked crack phone,

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got phone, ran out of juice,
cards got cut off.

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I'm standing in this line at
9:00 in the morning to get back

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over into America and there's a
turnstile and you have to throw

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a, you know, like, I don't know
what it was a peso or, you know,

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some kind of a coin into this
turnstile to walk back across

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the bridge at El Paso.
Well, I didn't have any money on

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me.
Like I said, my card had been

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cut off by my bank.
And so I get up to the turnstile

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and I, I act like I put a coin
in and I hit the turnstile and

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the federally or whatever he is
comes running up.

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He's like, and I'm like put a
put money in.

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I put money in He and thank God
he let me across because I had

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no means of getting back to
America and he let me across.

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Walk into downtown El Paso, the
Holiday Inn where the team's

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staying at is about 10 miles
away from downtown.

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Like I said, cards cut off,
phone doesn't work.

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Walking through downtown,
there's a bike sitting on the

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side of this building.
Grabbed a bike and then bike it

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down I-10 back to my hotel room.
Get there around, I guess it was

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like 11 O clock, you know, mid
morning, lay down in my hotel

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room bed, sleep for a couple
hours, get up, get on the bus

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and then proceed to hit two home
runs that night.

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And that's the story of my life,
too, to the the candles burning

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at both ends, you know, because
on one hand, I'm smoking crack

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and I'm going on these binges,
and on the other hand, I'm still

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playing well.
And so it seems like it's all

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working out, you know, and in
the meantime, I'm losing family,

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friends and money and
relationships.

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And.
But like I said, the baseball

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part was working out.
So, you know, it's.

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Yeah, that's.
Amazing that you could still

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function, but function at a high
level in a major in a major.

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Sport, right?
So, yeah, the part of, you know,

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hitting, they a lot of people
say hitting is one of the

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hardest things to do in sports,
hitting a baseball, right?

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And so I'm a thinker and
thinking can get you in trouble

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when you get in that batter's
box.

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And so if I had smoked crack all
night and hadn't slept, the last

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thing on earth I was thinking
about was hitting a baseball,

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you know, because my head's
ringing, my heart's still going

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nuts.
And so I kind of get better,

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man.
And that's, that's the sick part

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of it, you know, 'cause I did, I
wasn't, I wasn't thinking about

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what I was doing.
And it just happened.

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Were team mates aware of what
you're doing?

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I'm pretty sure towards the end
I had a roommate of mine that

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00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:20,600
called my mom.
We were in Fort Myers and my mom

219
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,440
just kind of dropped in on me in
Fort Myers FL.

220
00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:27,800
He flew in from Texas and just
trying to check up on me and see

221
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:31,200
if and everything was OK.
I think I, I, you know, a good

222
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,720
addict alcoholic really thinks
that they're hiding it from

223
00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:35,760
everybody.
But I'm pretty sure a lot of

224
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:39,680
people knew, you know, so I, I
know for sure at least one

225
00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:42,360
teammate knew because he called
my mom on me, you know, and

226
00:11:42,560 --> 00:11:44,840
we're grown men.
And here's my mom coming to Fort

227
00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:48,200
Myers, you know, checking in on
me, you know, part of it was,

228
00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:50,920
and I said I, I, I grew up in a
Leave It to Beaver family.

229
00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:54,720
My mom and dad are great, but my
dad being in baseball, you know,

230
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:57,640
all this stuff going on and
they, they couldn't put a finger

231
00:11:57,640 --> 00:11:59,320
on it.
But he's, you know, it's part of

232
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,320
the lie he tell my mom.
It's part of the lifestyle.

233
00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:04,640
And she's like, no, I think
something bigger is going on.

234
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:07,320
And I'll tell the story how I
got sober.

235
00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,400
I was in a big league spring
training with the Cincinnati

236
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:14,760
Reds in 2006 and my roommate was
from West Palm Beach.

237
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:18,440
He'd obviously driven over to
Sarasota and I'd flown in for

238
00:12:18,440 --> 00:12:21,280
spring training.
So, you know, once he gets the

239
00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:24,720
same old story man, we got done
with practice that day, he's

240
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,200
like, hey, you want to go to
strip clubs this year?

241
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:30,760
So we jump in, his in his car,
drive a strip club, have few

242
00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:33,600
drinks, then drive back to the
hotel.

243
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:37,720
So we're in a hotel and I'm
sitting there and I'm waiting

244
00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:39,760
for him to pass out because I'm
going to get the keys to his

245
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:43,560
BMW, go down MLK to the crack
house and get some crack.

246
00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:48,720
He passes out, I grab the keys
to his brand new BMW, drive down

247
00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:53,240
to the crack house in Sarasota,
FL Going to the crack house had

248
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:56,760
a couple $100 on me smoked
crack, you know, it's gone in an

249
00:12:56,760 --> 00:12:59,960
hour or two.
And one guy approaches me and

250
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:01,800
hey, hey, can I borrow that car
to go to Tampa?

251
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:04,240
And this is like 3 or 4 O clock
in the morning.

252
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:07,760
I said sure man, take the car.
And so he takes the car.

253
00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:11,040
Well I'm still sitting in this
crack house around 7:30 in the

254
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:14,360
morning.
No car cracked out of my mind.

255
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:20,600
Practice starts at 8:00 and I'm
I'm careful like, you know, this

256
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:24,320
is part of it, like because I've
never had a fault like this ever

257
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:25,960
in my life.
But I remember while I'm walking

258
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:29,400
down, you know, it's so vivid.
I'm walking down U.S. 41 time

259
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:33,480
Miami Trail in Sarasota.
And I remember thinking, hey,

260
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:36,680
man, it's all over.
You know, you just, you've

261
00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:39,960
thrown everything in the trash.
It's all gone and all.

262
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:42,760
And I was, you know, I've never
really had suicidal thoughts

263
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:45,400
before.
You know, it's gone, as I'll

264
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:49,120
explain later, when I got into
rehab, like I'm like AI felt

265
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:51,520
like I was my you know, I was
I'm I'm God.

266
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:55,960
You know, that's kind of how I
saw myself and I wanted to just

267
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:59,920
throw myself in front of a car.
You know, that morning and never

268
00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:02,080
really that that's the only time
in my life I've ever had it

269
00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,000
fought like that where I wanted
to kill myself.

270
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:07,160
But something grabbed a hold of
me that morning and I walked

271
00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:11,360
over to a pay phone, called my
mom and you know, I'm trying to

272
00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:15,240
cry on you.
But my mom, she said, hey, get

273
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,880
back to the hotel.
We're going to get you back to

274
00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:18,840
Texas.
I said.

275
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:23,000
I said, all right, so you know,
I did what she told me to do.

276
00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:26,280
Got back to the hotel.
The police were there still no

277
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:29,240
car.
You know, guards in some crab

278
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:31,440
dealers hands, you know, and
good part of the story.

279
00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:34,840
The car came back the next day.
I guess I wasn't there to to see

280
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:36,440
it.
I was already on a plane back to

281
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:38,680
Texas.
Cincinnati Reg released me on

282
00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:41,760
the spot.
I went back to Texas and then

283
00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:43,680
that's when we started trying to
figure things out.

284
00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:48,800
So but yeah, got back to Texas
and you know, even at that point

285
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:53,480
and you know, in this whole 7
years, three MLB drug tests

286
00:14:53,480 --> 00:14:57,120
failed, lost two cars.
At this point I lost my own.

287
00:14:57,320 --> 00:15:04,400
I had a big truck on 24 inch
wheels, you know that I same

288
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:06,480
type of thing had happened and
it never came back.

289
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:10,800
Lost this guy at BMW and all
these bad things have happened

290
00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:15,000
and still here I am.
I finally agreed to go to rehab

291
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,320
and I'm in rehab and I still
don't think I have a problem.

292
00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:22,200
You know, I'm looking at this is
back in Dallas and back then and

293
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:25,360
it still may be the case, but
black tar heroin was a big

294
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:27,080
problem in the Dallas Fort Worth
area.

295
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:30,400
And so I'm in this rehab with
about 100 hundred people.

296
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:34,720
It's Coed and, you know, a
couple people Oded and died and,

297
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:37,680
you know, I'm looking around at
all these people like 10.

298
00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:41,200
These people are losers.
You know, why am I here?

299
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,440
You know that I do not belong
here.

300
00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:46,280
I shouldn't be part of this.
Like, you know, I am way better

301
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:49,440
than these people.
And so I go on for a couple

302
00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:51,640
weeks thinking that way while
I'm in rehab.

303
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,240
And lo and behold, you know,
it's part of my problem too.

304
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:58,920
There was a girl in there and I
ended up sleeping with this girl

305
00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:02,280
in rehab, which, you know, any
kind of rehab that's it's

306
00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:05,040
totally against the rules.
And so I slept with this girl in

307
00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:07,720
rehab.
Well, I guess she decided that

308
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:09,480
she needed to tell her counselor
the next day.

309
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:12,520
She told her counselor.
So my counselor comes to me that

310
00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:13,880
next day.
He goes, hey, you got something

311
00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:16,360
to tell me?
I said no, I'm good.

312
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:19,720
And he goes, hey, you slept with
so and so I said no man, I

313
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:21,920
didn't do that.
He goes, yeah, you did.

314
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:26,880
He said you got 2 choices.
A you can get the hell out of

315
00:16:26,880 --> 00:16:32,480
here or B, you can tell the
patient group that you put them

316
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:35,200
in danger.
You can tell your parents and

317
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:39,920
you can tell your girlfriend.
My girlfriend is my wife now.

318
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:42,920
My girlfriend I had met three
years previously.

319
00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:45,800
I met her in 2003.
I am married to her today.

320
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:50,840
And so with those options,
options in front of me and be in

321
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:53,800
the pussy that I am, I was like,
I'm leaving.

322
00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:59,000
So I go back to my room and I'm
packing my shit up, about to

323
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,880
walk out of my room.
And you know, I've talked about

324
00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:05,359
this lot.
There's, you know, 99% of this

325
00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:10,079
is Jesus.
And I did, I put Jesus on the

326
00:17:10,079 --> 00:17:13,680
shelf and I'm about to walk out
of that room.

327
00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:18,160
And, you know, it's it, it's
most like for a spiritual

328
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,319
relationship, most of it takes
it's long.

329
00:17:20,319 --> 00:17:23,240
You know, it takes time.
But then there's some of those

330
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:27,040
burning Bush moments you have.
And I was about to walk out of

331
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:31,320
my room and I had a burning Bush
moment and it hit me smack dab

332
00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:33,440
in the face.
It's like, dude, where am I

333
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:36,880
going to go?
I'm the only one getting kicked

334
00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:38,320
out of here.
What does that mean?

335
00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:40,880
Like I'm the biggest loser in
here.

336
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:44,800
And I started thinking about
like being in these rooms, you

337
00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,880
know, where you get your
emotions out and you talk about

338
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:50,240
the trauma and things like
you're, you know, and then

339
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:52,680
that's what sucks, man.
Like the people that were in

340
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,680
there with me had been abused,
had been sexually molested, had

341
00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,960
loved ones die.
They had all these wonderful

342
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:04,040
excuses to use drugs, right?
You know that that a normal put,

343
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,560
you know, that sucks, man.
And I get it, man.

344
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:07,960
And I understand why you use
drugs.

345
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:10,160
Nothing like that ever happened
to me.

346
00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:13,720
I didn't have any excuses.
I just wanted to have more fun,

347
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:17,360
you know, and that it hit, I was
like, dude, I'm the most selfish

348
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:20,960
person in here.
I'm, I'm a son of a bitch, you

349
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:22,320
know?
And then, then like I said, I

350
00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:25,040
that's when I made the decision.
I was like, dude, I got to take

351
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,160
this seriously.
And I'm really screwed up

352
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:28,920
because I don't have these
excuses.

353
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:32,800
I don't have anywhere to go and
I have serious problem.

354
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:35,760
I can't stop on my own, you
know, And so I may, I took that

355
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:39,760
first step and the next two
weeks were a breeze.

356
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:43,120
I got out of there, man.
You know, my my wife now.

357
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:44,160
He was.
Yeah.

358
00:18:44,160 --> 00:18:46,760
I had to tell my parents and my
girlfriend at the time, who is

359
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:49,720
my wife now.
Like, things got, things got

360
00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,280
crazy.
It wasn't good.

361
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:55,160
But dude, I stayed sober, man.
And, you know, got out of rehab.

362
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,880
I did the whole yeah, that's
part of the story too, man.

363
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:00,560
Like, yeah, I grew up Catholic.
Yeah.

364
00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,960
And I've always, I can, dude, I
can go to a church and RIP it

365
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:08,040
apart, right.
And so I got out of got out of

366
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,080
rehab, didn't really want to go
to church.

367
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:12,600
I was like, I'm going to try to
say anything.

368
00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:17,120
So, you know, I was doing two to
three meetings a day.

369
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,520
And I get it hard, man.
I was a sponsor within a couple

370
00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:24,840
months that there was this
really aggressive program in

371
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:28,000
Dallas that I went to and they
were all about getting through

372
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,880
the steps as quick as you can
and then, you know, getting

373
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:36,480
starting to be a sponsor.
And so I hit the a, a hard, did

374
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:38,880
it for years.
But I, I, I remember, I

375
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:42,640
remember, yeah, like I said, I
could tear a church apart and,

376
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,240
you know, part of it, man, like,
you know, I was looking at it as

377
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:48,400
a religion and you know, that
that's the whole thing.

378
00:19:48,440 --> 00:19:51,440
It's a, it's a, it's your own
spiritual relationship.

379
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,920
And I should have listened to
those words because I remember

380
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,640
being in a A1 day.
This is years into it.

381
00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,120
And the guy in the back stood
up.

382
00:19:58,120 --> 00:19:59,760
He's like, hey, my name is so
and so.

383
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,880
And, you know, I got 30 years
sobriety, my higher powers, the

384
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:06,360
future.
And when I heard that, man, I,

385
00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:09,200
you know, 'cause there's
crackheads fresh off the street

386
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:13,680
in there and I'm thinking the
future, man, come on, dude.

387
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:16,040
You know, it just kind of rubbed
me the wrong, wrong way.

388
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,520
And I was like, a, A is a
church.

389
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:19,080
I'm getting the hell out of
here, man.

390
00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:25,000
So I left a A for years, man.
But you know, through my

391
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:30,480
sobriety, man, like I've learned
a a church nature, my family,

392
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:33,720
anything and everything I do,
it's all rules just to help me

393
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:37,880
grow my spiritual relationship.
And so I try to go in with an

394
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:43,280
open mind everywhere I go now
and use whatever it may be to

395
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:46,160
help grow my own relationship
with God with Jesus Christ.

396
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:50,320
So, you know, Jesus is real.
And the other, I was thinking

397
00:20:50,320 --> 00:20:54,520
about this man.
It was, it was this was in 2003

398
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:58,760
in New Britain, CT.
And you know, when it first

399
00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:02,280
happened and a year or two
afterwards, I'd forgotten about

400
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:03,640
it.
I just thought it was a dream.

401
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:09,640
And I remember I, you know, I, I
was midway in my addiction heavy

402
00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:10,880
into it.
And I was doing, you know, this

403
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:14,840
is New Britain CT.
There was tons of what I needed

404
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:19,880
up there as far as drugs.
And I was laying in bed and like

405
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:22,880
I said, I thought it was a
dream, but I was awoken to 4

406
00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:26,080
hooded figures.
I had two at my shoulder and two

407
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,320
at my feet.
You know, they, they had hoods

408
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,400
on, their faces were pitch
black.

409
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:32,600
You, you couldn't see any facial
features.

410
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:37,480
And I remember being scared out
of my mind and I couldn't move,

411
00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:40,960
I couldn't talk.
And then that was the scary part

412
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,000
because I couldn't move my arms,
I couldn't move my legs.

413
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:44,240
It was like they were holding me
down.

414
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:48,400
They were pinning me.
And I, you know, I, I remember

415
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:52,440
letting out after I don't know
how long it was, I finally got

416
00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:54,960
out of yell and then they
disappeared.

417
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,880
And for the longest time I
thought it was a dream and I

418
00:21:58,520 --> 00:22:01,960
didn't think it was real.
And, you know, over the years,

419
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:05,320
like I've come to find out, I
mean, dude like that man that,

420
00:22:05,360 --> 00:22:08,440
that I don't want to give him
too much time on your show.

421
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:11,400
But the devil exists, man.
The evil is out there, man.

422
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,880
And you know, that evil was in
my heart.

423
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:16,760
You know what?
That and I'm, I'm grateful that

424
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:20,960
I've got the relationship I have
now and that I've been been able

425
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:25,080
to, I like the word Andy, 'cause
you know, when you, when you're

426
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:27,960
growing up Catholic, man, repent
sounds terrible.

427
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:30,680
I got to get in front of this
priest and tell him all these

428
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:34,120
bad things I've done.
But all it means is just turn

429
00:22:34,120 --> 00:22:38,000
around, you know, and it's never
too late to turn around, man.

430
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:41,560
And I and I got the chance to
turn around and and change my

431
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:44,600
life for the better man so.
Yeah, I'm.

432
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:48,360
I'm sure I've just one of many
in your life, all in your life

433
00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:51,040
that are glad you did that and,
you know, glad you're here to,

434
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:52,960
to share.
You know, as you said, the war

435
00:22:52,960 --> 00:22:55,520
stories, but more importantly,
you come through them all.

436
00:22:56,040 --> 00:22:59,720
You know, one thing that amazes
me is that through all of this,

437
00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:02,280
you end up back in baseball
somehow.

438
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:03,640
Right.
Yeah.

439
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,680
So I, I, I never thought it
would happen.

440
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:10,120
And it's when I first got sober,
I was like, no way I'm going to

441
00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:11,920
be able to put myself back in
that environment.

442
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:17,280
Well, I guess I started going to
that really aggressive group in,

443
00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:21,960
in Dallas and had a mentor there
sponsor, whatever you want to

444
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:23,800
call him.
But he's like, you can go

445
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:27,080
anywhere.
You can do anything as long as

446
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,680
your motives are in check.
And I'm like, all right.

447
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:32,800
And he started getting in my
head and I started learning more

448
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:35,160
and I'm like, dude, I can go
anywhere.

449
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:38,960
I can do anything as long as I
know why I'm there and the, and

450
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:42,640
the reasons are good.
And so I get started getting,

451
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,720
you know, some months of
sobriety under my belt, agents,

452
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,600
you know, hey, why don't you
give us another shot?

453
00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:54,360
So I did.
And so in 2007, I've just got, I

454
00:23:54,360 --> 00:23:56,720
went and played for an
independent team called the 4th

455
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:58,800
Cats.
You know, it's 20 minutes from

456
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:01,280
my house.
Had a really good season with

457
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:03,840
the 4th Cats.
And the next thing I know I'm in

458
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,160
Dodger Blue Man playing AAA
baseball.

459
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,080
And The funny thing about that
is 2008.

460
00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:12,760
So I'm about, I don't know, a
year and a half, two years sober

461
00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:17,200
and I'm living in the gold
nugget on the on the downtown in

462
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:21,680
Las Vegas, man.
And, you know, I was sober man,

463
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:24,600
but I still wasn't a good
person, you know, and, and it,

464
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:30,080
it, it took me, God, my, my, my
sexual misconduct, man, I was,

465
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,360
it took me forever to clean that
up, man.

466
00:24:32,360 --> 00:24:37,400
I, I, it took me until about
2011, end of 2011 before I

467
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:42,080
became a one woman man.
And, you know, as far as my

468
00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:45,120
morals go and what, what Jesus
wants me to do and that, you

469
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:49,600
know, that to the standard I am
now, you know, but back, you

470
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:53,120
know, in Vegas, I was a wild
man, but I stayed sober man.

471
00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:57,000
So, you know, but yeah, I got, I
got to play, I got to play for

472
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:02,360
another six years after that
man, you know, and I don't know

473
00:25:02,360 --> 00:25:05,920
how much it weighed into it, you
know, cuz the three MLB drug

474
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:09,080
tests I've failed, you know, it
and the, some of the things I

475
00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:12,280
had done, I don't know how much
I drug my name through the dirt.

476
00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:17,280
And I wasn't given the greatest
opportunity, but I was given an

477
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:20,120
opportunity, man.
I'm blessed for that.

478
00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:24,440
Cuz, you know, I got a uniform
on man, and I'm getting paid to

479
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:28,240
play baseball.
So yeah, it's it's, it's fine.

480
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:33,680
So.
In hindsight, any idea what was

481
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:35,720
the final thing?
Or maybe it was wasn't the final

482
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:38,520
thing, but that they got your,
as you said, your morality just

483
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:42,680
to lock in finally.
It was just like I kept growing

484
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:44,600
in the growing in the spirit
man.

485
00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:48,720
And so, you know, and I, I had
another guy explained to me,

486
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:52,400
he's like, he's like, dude, you
know, it may have been a

487
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:54,360
hypothetical character that he
was talking about.

488
00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:56,520
He's like, you know, I got a
buddy, I had a buddy of mine who

489
00:25:56,520 --> 00:26:00,760
got sober and, you know, his
goal was to sleep with one woman

490
00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:03,320
a week.
And, and so he got to that goal.

491
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:05,400
He stopped sleeping with
multiple women a week.

492
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:08,360
And so he started sleeping with
one woman a week.

493
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,880
And then he was, he's like, you
know, I'm going to sleep with

494
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:14,440
one woman a month.
And, you know, one woman a year.

495
00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:17,240
I'm going to have, I'm going to
make it a goal to have a

496
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:19,480
girlfriend and just be faithful
to her.

497
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,520
And then, you know, I'm going to
make it a goal to get married

498
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,200
and have a wife that I'm
faithful to.

499
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:27,080
And, and it was kind of like
that for me, man.

500
00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:31,720
Like, you know, it was step by
step, you know, and with that

501
00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:34,640
being said to like I said, I'm a
self.

502
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,560
I was, I still am a selfish
person, not as much as I was

503
00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:48,760
back then, but my wife Sylvia,
who I met in 2003, has been, has

504
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:55,640
been unbelievable, you know, and
had my back and she's seen well,

505
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:57,960
the way she explains it, she's
like, I know what you were

506
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,720
capable of and that's why I
stayed.

507
00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:02,800
And, you know, we have a great
marriage.

508
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,440
Like I said, we've, we've been
together since 2003.

509
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:09,520
We got married in 2013.
And it took me forever to see,

510
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:12,480
see that, you know, because I
was such a selfish person, I

511
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:16,400
couldn't see past myself, you
know, her love and I see I'm

512
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:18,200
grateful, man.
I get to wake up every day with

513
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:22,440
her man, and it's awesome
feeling and so, but it was it

514
00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:25,200
was step by step man, like I I
like I said, I was screwed up

515
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:28,800
sexually too, man, I was AI was
a hoe, you know, so.

516
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:34,240
You know one of the things that
is amazing in all of your roller

517
00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:35,800
coaster ride and we're.
We're not done.

518
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,240
I know Yeah.
The the the thing the only

519
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:41,240
things that really still bring
out the emotion in you is

520
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:43,120
talking about your mom and
talking about your wife.

521
00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:46,040
Yeah, man.
So we talk about like divine

522
00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:50,360
intervention in Jesus, but man
is just, is there divine

523
00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:51,600
motherly love?
Is it?

524
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:54,680
Is it someone seeing you the way
you don't see yourself like?

525
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:56,520
Well, you know, that's the thing
too.

526
00:27:56,520 --> 00:28:00,520
And that's what, you know, I
don't, you know, I don't go to a

527
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:02,640
a lot.
I go, I, we go to church every

528
00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:06,280
Sunday.
But as far as giving back, you

529
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:09,640
know, I got, I'll see a guy out
on the streets, you know, that's

530
00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:13,800
probably a drug addict and I'll
look at him and I'm like, damn,

531
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:17,160
it's got to suck, man.
Because for me, dude, I had a

532
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:20,760
great support system, man.
I had a mom and a dad that loved

533
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:23,080
me that would go to the end of
the earth for me.

534
00:28:23,080 --> 00:28:28,000
I had a girlfriend and a wife.
Now that I mean, she had my,

535
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:31,840
she's my, she's got a hat that
says she's first generation

536
00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:33,800
Mexican man.
And she's got a hat that says

537
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,000
ride or die.
You know, she's got got a little

538
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,160
gangster in her, but she's like,
I'm your ride or die bitch.

539
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:43,240
And I'm like, I know you are so.
But yeah, man, I, I was blessed

540
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:45,880
in that fact too, because I had
people around me that really

541
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:47,920
freaking cared.
And I, and I know other people

542
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:51,200
do too, but some don't, man, you
know?

543
00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:54,760
And then that sucks.
And so I, I'm grateful for that

544
00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:58,360
man.
At some point, the next thing

545
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:02,720
for you, you begin waking up
with kind of a, a feeling of

546
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,960
numbness, right?
So.

547
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:06,920
Towards the end of my career I
would have these.

548
00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:10,480
This was in 2011, 2012.
I'd have these weird things

549
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:13,640
where I'd tilt my head down and
I get these electric shocks in

550
00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:17,000
my fingers and toes.
And so I just I just marked it

551
00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:19,280
off of being tired.
You know, I'm wearing myself out

552
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:23,240
playing baseball every day.
You know, that's what it is and

553
00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:26,520
progress.
The 2013 I wake up and my left

554
00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:28,960
foot's numb.
You know, I was like, why is my

555
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,320
you know, I had no idea why it
was numb and it stayed numb the

556
00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,080
entire freaking day.
And it was.

557
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:38,440
I had never experienced that
thing anything like that.

558
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:43,000
My wife in my life, so Long
story short, by the end of the

559
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:47,000
fifth day, neck down was numb,
couldn't feel anything, lost

560
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,600
control of my bowels.
When I would try to walk, I

561
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:52,720
couldn't feel the ground.
So I didn't know where I was

562
00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:55,160
stepping.
I was halfway falling down.

563
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:58,320
And at that point, you know, it
was that fifth day my wife come

564
00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:00,920
home and she said, but she
wasn't we were, we were about to

565
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,920
get married and she said, you
know, you need to go emergency

566
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:06,440
room.
I said, no, it's you know, it'll

567
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:07,840
be fine.
It's going to go away.

568
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:11,040
Well, she convinced me and I, we
got up there, you know, I'm

569
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:14,960
thinking I've had a stroke or
something and they run the MRI

570
00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:18,880
and everything and they come
back that, that first time in

571
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:22,920
2013, they said I had this thing
called transverse myelitis and

572
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:25,760
they said, hey, you got
transverse myelitis.

573
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,920
You know, five years from now,
if you don't have another event,

574
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:32,920
you're fine.
Well, you know, I took that all

575
00:30:32,920 --> 00:30:35,680
I, I took that as a with a grain
of salt over all right, one time

576
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:39,000
event, no big deal.
You know, it's, I don't know

577
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:40,680
what caused it, but I should be
fine.

578
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:47,760
Well, Fast forward to 2017.
I'm here at Al in Alabama.

579
00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:49,880
We moved here.
My mom and daddy got divorced in

580
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:54,040
2012 and she moved to Alabama to
be closer to her sister.

581
00:30:54,360 --> 00:31:01,040
So in 2016 we moved here to be
closer to my mom. 2017, same

582
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:04,000
exact thing happens.
I go to the University of

583
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,680
Alabama Birmingham medical
clinic.

584
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,240
They run an MRII.
Remember this, this is funny

585
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:13,480
story.
So I'm in, I'm in the bed, I'm

586
00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:16,560
laying there and they have
there's a Med student in the

587
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,200
room.
He'd come in that morning before

588
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,840
the doctor and he's like, hey,
we got the results of your MRI

589
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:22,400
back.
And I was like, yeah, I was

590
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:24,720
like, and I already been doing a
bunch of research on my phone at

591
00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:26,840
this point.
And he goes, yeah, man.

592
00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:29,520
And wait for a doctor to come in
and then explain it to you.

593
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:33,520
I said, well, what did you see?
He goes, well, I was like, what

594
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,480
was it?
And he goes, well, we saw a

595
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:41,320
couple lesions and when he said
the word lesion dude, I just big

596
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:44,920
dude just started falling right.
And Med student runs out of the

597
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:47,760
room scared to death.
But at that point I knew I had

598
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:52,400
multiple sclerosis man.
And for the next God man for the

599
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:57,640
next like 3 or 4 weeks, all it
was I was, I was, I was

600
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:00,040
depressed man.
I mean, I cried every single

601
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:01,400
day.
And to that point, he, I guess

602
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:05,080
my son was, she was old enough
to walk.

603
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:07,160
You know, he didn't understand
what was going on.

604
00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:11,400
But I'm looking at this kid, my
son, and I'm like, he's going to

605
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:13,160
have a daddy that's going to be
in a wheelchair.

606
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:17,480
You know, I like this terrible.
I'm this is.

607
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:22,040
Yeah, I just, I was devastated.
And, you know, it was a just got

608
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:25,800
diagnosed with a chronic
debilitating disease.

609
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:28,680
And you see all these, read all
these stories about people in

610
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:31,080
wheelchairs and they can't walk
and this and that.

611
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:34,120
I, I didn't, I didn't know what
I was going to do.

612
00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:37,680
And I went ahead, gone home and
laid in bed for three weeks,

613
00:32:37,680 --> 00:32:41,040
didn't move.
And my wife and my mom had been

614
00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:45,040
hovering over me and doing a
bunch of research, didn't get a

615
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:47,120
ton of direction from the
neurologist.

616
00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:49,120
You know, we're handed a bunch
of packets with different

617
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:52,120
medications, had no idea which
one to take.

618
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:57,040
And my wife and, and my mom had
found this doctor name is Doctor

619
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,920
Terry Walls.
She's written a book called The

620
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:02,720
Walls Protocol.
And it's, it's a lifestyle, it's

621
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,880
a way to live.
It's a healthy type living

622
00:33:05,880 --> 00:33:08,960
lifestyle.
And it, it has food, vitamins,

623
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:12,560
minerals, hormones, you know,
the whole gamut, man.

624
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:15,560
And they had been studying all
this and I remember it was about

625
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:19,160
3 or 4 weeks in.
I just, I, I woke up one day and

626
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:22,840
I'm like, dude, I got to move
and I got up and I took a shower

627
00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:26,800
and put a smile on my face and
then grabbed the book that my

628
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:29,800
wife and mom had gotten me.
And I was like, dude, I'm going

629
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:33,440
to, I'm going to beat this shit.
And so I started living that

630
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,120
way, man.
And it's like, you know, you

631
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:38,160
know, no gluten, no grains, no
dairy, no nightshades.

632
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,760
There's a plethora of pills over
there.

633
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:44,800
But the, my mainstay is D3.
And you know, a lot of people

634
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:47,160
cringe when they hear how much
D3 I take a day.

635
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:51,920
But dude, I've been taking
30,000 IU and D3 daily

636
00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:54,520
consistently.
For how long has it been?

637
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:58,720
It's seven years, you know, and
knock on wood, man, I don't have

638
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:01,960
any symptoms, man.
I say, and this is another thing

639
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:04,640
I'm a big advocate for.
I was, it was about a month out,

640
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:06,240
well, two months out at this
point.

641
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:09,719
And I'd read where women are
three times more likely to get

642
00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:12,400
met multiple sclerosis than men.
A lot of that has to do with

643
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:14,719
testosterone.
So I was like, no, I'm going to

644
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:17,480
damn hormone clinic.
So I go to hormone clinic and

645
00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:20,159
got tested and I was like 110
and you're supposed to be

646
00:34:20,159 --> 00:34:23,679
between 300 and 800, right?
And so I get prescribed

647
00:34:23,679 --> 00:34:29,960
testosterone and literally was
like in a month, like everything

648
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:33,719
went away like that.
Somehow down the road, my

649
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,480
hormones got screwed up, which
screwed up my immune system,

650
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:40,800
flipped it on its head.
And when my hormones got right,

651
00:34:41,159 --> 00:34:44,440
when my blood got right, it was
like everything went away.

652
00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:47,520
And then I, you know, my and my
prayers at night, like you know,

653
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:50,639
I, like I said, I, I leave with
Jesus and I say I, Jesus, take

654
00:34:50,639 --> 00:34:53,400
away my lesions.
Jesus, take away my Ms. give me

655
00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:55,560
the strength to get up and go
tomorrow.

656
00:34:56,000 --> 00:35:00,320
And so, you know, I can talk and
pray all I want to Jesus, but I

657
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:01,880
got to put in the work too,
right?

658
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:06,160
And so I did this morning.
This morning was cardio day and

659
00:35:06,240 --> 00:35:10,200
I went, 4I climbed 4000 feet on
the Stairmaster in less than an

660
00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:12,240
hour.
It's, it's almost 400 floors,

661
00:35:12,240 --> 00:35:15,800
you know.
And so with all this being said,

662
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:20,120
like, you know, in my current
role, I call on neurologist,

663
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:22,800
right?
So I, I sometimes I'm around Ms.

664
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:27,120
patients and, you know, and
anytime I am addressing somebody

665
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:30,520
who's Ms., you know, I tell them
what works for me.

666
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:34,480
But, and then like, most people
aren't going to wake up at 3:00

667
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:37,480
in the morning and go climb a
Stairmaster on 4000 feet in the

668
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:39,840
morning.
But I swear by like, you know,

669
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:43,400
the way I eat, the hormones, the
vitamins and minerals, the

670
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:46,840
exercise and dude, I'm
perfectly, I'm, I'm in better

671
00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:48,960
shape now.
Like I, I'm almost in, I mean, I

672
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:51,000
can't say I don't, I'm not going
to take my shirt off on your

673
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:55,880
program, but I'm about 5% body
fat for being in being

674
00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:59,320
competition ready.
And like, all I'd have to do is,

675
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:02,360
you know, they'd be, I'm, I'm 8
weeks out for the competition

676
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:05,880
ready at any point.
And so, you know, I explained

677
00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:09,240
all that to people that have MSI
said this is what works for me.

678
00:36:09,240 --> 00:36:14,120
I'm not a doctor, but this is,
this is, this is how I stay

679
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:16,080
healthy.
This is how I don't, I don't

680
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:18,160
have any, I don't have any
tingling or anything.

681
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:22,200
I said I've been living that way
for going on 8 years now man so.

682
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:26,000
That's amazing.
So you've mentioned previously a

683
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:28,520
number of times that the
importance of sharing and giving

684
00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:31,040
back.
So, so how is that showing up

685
00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:33,440
that you just how, how are you
talking to those patients?

686
00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:34,760
What?
What's bringing you in front of

687
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:36,640
people these days?
Right.

688
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:40,880
So when I, when I first, when I
first retired from baseball, you

689
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:44,160
know, IA, lot of the people that
I'd known over the years that

690
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,920
have retired early had gone into
medical device cells or

691
00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:53,080
pharmaceutical cells.
So that's back in 2012, 2013, I

692
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:54,720
was applying for these jobs,
right?

693
00:36:54,720 --> 00:36:58,280
And I get in these interviews
and they, you know, and this is

694
00:36:58,280 --> 00:37:01,080
our, this is I, I had become an
extrovert at this point because

695
00:37:01,080 --> 00:37:04,680
I, I, you know, where I was 711
or wherever.

696
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:08,600
Hey, man, I'm a crackhead.
You know, they're on that big

697
00:37:08,600 --> 00:37:11,000
cloud addict, you know, the
sobriety deal.

698
00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:15,720
And so I was real open and have
a good personality and those the

699
00:37:15,720 --> 00:37:17,920
interview, the interviewers go,
hey, man, we love your

700
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:19,800
personality.
You're great, but you don't have

701
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,400
any experience.
And you know, that went off for

702
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:25,400
a while and I had a buddy call
me and he said, hey, man, come

703
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:27,920
with me to get a car tomorrow.
And I said, all right.

704
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,800
And then what do I, I, that's
why I own a repo company.

705
00:37:31,280 --> 00:37:34,800
That's OK, I'll do I need a gun.
He said, no, just just come

706
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:36,600
with.
So I go with him, We pick up

707
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:39,240
this car.
He we pull up to the car, he

708
00:37:39,240 --> 00:37:42,200
lets me out of the car and gives
me the keys.

709
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:43,680
So I just go get that car out of
the driveway.

710
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:48,080
OK, So you know, not thinking
I'm walking up in this driveway

711
00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:51,160
and then all of a sudden it hit
me and my heart's racing.

712
00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:52,760
I'm like, Oh my God, this is
crazy.

713
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:56,480
And take the car and like it's
like gone in 60 seconds.

714
00:37:56,480 --> 00:38:00,440
Nicolas Cage, but legal, right?
We get back to the lot and I

715
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:01,880
asked was how much do you make
the car?

716
00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:04,840
And he said 608 hundred a car
and I do 4 to 6 a day.

717
00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:08,400
So I rolled repo on cars for the
next three or four years with

718
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:12,800
him back in the Dallas 4th area
and totally put the pharma

719
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:16,240
cells, medical device cells on
the back burner.

720
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:21,000
Well, you know, over that time
period we had decided, hey, my

721
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,520
mom's in Alabama, let's move to
Alabama.

722
00:38:23,520 --> 00:38:27,840
We ain't got nothing going on.
So I took the thing first thing

723
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:31,280
I came across in Birmingham and
it was selling copiers.

724
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:36,160
And so came to Birmingham, AL
selling copiers and that was God

725
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:39,640
awful, but it gave me the
experience I needed.

726
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:44,200
And that's when I made the jump
into pharmaceutical cells.

727
00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:47,480
And then it progressed really
quickly.

728
00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:50,160
I, I was, I started off an entry
level position.

729
00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:55,120
But This is why I am grateful
for Ms. man, because you know,

730
00:38:55,120 --> 00:38:58,360
over the years just doing the
study and on my own, I'm not an

731
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:03,440
expert on neurodegenerative and
neuromuscular diseases, but it's

732
00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:05,920
my hobby, man.
I study it.

733
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:09,440
I read everything on it and I
made the jump from entry level

734
00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:15,000
to rare disease, which most of
these, my team, they all have 15

735
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:18,960
or 20 years experience, whereas
I have, I have six years, you

736
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:23,160
know, And so I, I made a huge
jump from entry level to rare

737
00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:26,680
disease that we do, I work for
Johnson and Johnson and, and,

738
00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:30,680
and our I educate neurologist on
my city of Gravis and I teach

739
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:34,200
them how to treat it.
So, yeah, so that's, that's my

740
00:39:34,200 --> 00:39:37,640
current role.
And Ms. played a huge part in

741
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:39,400
that.
And so I get to be around

742
00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:42,800
neurologists all day.
I get to talk to them about how

743
00:39:42,800 --> 00:39:44,960
I live.
You know, sometimes I run into

744
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:48,520
patients, talk to them about how
I live and, and what works for

745
00:39:48,520 --> 00:39:50,520
me.
And, and yeah, that's, that's

746
00:39:50,520 --> 00:39:53,360
part of the giving back, you
know, but, but the biggest part

747
00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:56,000
of giving back is, like I said,
I don't spend a lot of time in a

748
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,680
A and we go to church once a
week.

749
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:01,120
And I've discovered over the
years that, like I said, talking

750
00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:07,440
about 7-11, but like 711 or
Circle K or at the gym or when I

751
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:10,160
pull up at a stop sign.
And then, you know, and this may

752
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:12,960
be controversial, but if there's
a dude at a stop sign asking for

753
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:15,960
cash, dude, I know what it is
not to have money.

754
00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:18,720
I know what it is to want to be
high and not be able to get

755
00:40:18,720 --> 00:40:19,920
high.
And.

756
00:40:21,240 --> 00:40:25,040
I'm giving the dude, if I got
$100 on me, I'm giving him $100.

757
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:28,480
You know, I'm giving him $100.
Say, hey, dude, Jesus loves you.

758
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,440
It ain't got to be like this,
you know, do what you need to

759
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:33,600
do, man.
You know, and, and if he takes

760
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:39,800
$100 and goes and buys whatever,
man, that's man, at least, hey,

761
00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:41,200
at least he got some comfort
too.

762
00:40:41,200 --> 00:40:43,760
At least he was, he didn't do
anything crazy like steal

763
00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:47,840
something to rob somebody, man.
And so those are the things that

764
00:40:47,840 --> 00:40:50,440
I do, man, like talk, just
talking to people in my daily

765
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:52,680
life.
Like just yesterday, yeah, I had

766
00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:55,240
a nurse come in and she's like,
she's like, man, you have an

767
00:40:55,240 --> 00:40:57,400
awesome testimony.
We'll, we tell my friend.

768
00:40:57,760 --> 00:41:01,960
And, you know, so I, I don't, I
don't worry if people judge me.

769
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:04,120
I and I've seen it in some
people's eyes, like when you

770
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:07,400
tell them you're a crackhead.
And, you know, like, sometimes I

771
00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:09,760
do it for the shock value and
other times I just tell them I'm

772
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,040
an addict.
You know, it's great.

773
00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:14,680
So sometimes you want to see
people's, people's aghast at it,

774
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:19,600
you know, just so 'cause they
don't picture that, you know, it

775
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,280
is what it is.
But anywhere I'm at, man, as if

776
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:25,480
I have the opportunity, man, I'm
telling my testimony, you know,

777
00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:28,320
'cause there's, I mean, you
know, there's addicts and

778
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:31,200
alcohol.
It's, you know, it's a, it's a

779
00:41:31,600 --> 00:41:34,360
epidemic, man.
And run into them every day.

780
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:37,000
And if they hear me talk about
it, maybe it might help them in

781
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:40,440
the future, man.
So Kelly, looking back on your

782
00:41:40,440 --> 00:41:45,920
whole journey, what stands out
as the thing that you are most

783
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:51,280
proud of most?
Proud of, there's a couple

784
00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:54,400
things, man, but I'm most proud
of the relationship because my

785
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:57,160
mom is.
So it's funny story.

786
00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:59,680
So yeah, I grew up Catholic.
My mom's still Catholic, right?

787
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:05,040
And she was the spiritual person
in our family.

788
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:07,480
Like I said, my dad, I love my
dad.

789
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:09,360
He's a great guy.
I'm going to tell him to listen

790
00:42:09,360 --> 00:42:11,840
to this dude.
I love him, you know, and but my

791
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:16,560
mom was a spiritual backbone and
she was the one that always

792
00:42:16,560 --> 00:42:20,720
tried to make church a priority
and get us to Sunday school and

793
00:42:20,720 --> 00:42:25,200
do things like that.
And, you know, baseball was such

794
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,840
a priority and it and it for me,
it was a priority, man.

795
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:30,880
It wasn't just my dad, man.
I was like, what God practice

796
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:32,320
got to do this, got to do that,
man.

797
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:34,720
If we're playing on Sunday, all
right, we're on a date, we're

798
00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:40,000
going to baseball game, you
know, and my mom, that's all she

799
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:41,600
wanted us.
She wanted us to have a

800
00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:43,960
relationship with God.
She wanted us to know Jesus

801
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,600
Christ.
And I was just this was just

802
00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:50,960
last week, you know, my mom, I
remember, I'll never forget it.

803
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:53,680
Like I go to a non
denominational church.

804
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:57,960
You know, I'm just, I don't, I
hate labels, man.

805
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:02,440
And you know, politically I'm
I'm a libertarian Religiously,

806
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:04,480
I'm just a follower of Jesus,
man.

807
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:06,840
Like I don't, I don't want to be
labeled left or right.

808
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:11,320
I don't want to be labeled as a
Catholic or Baptist or whatever,

809
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:13,080
you know, I do.
I just follow Jesus, man.

810
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:16,680
And I don't you know.
So anyways, you know, I got re

811
00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:19,480
baptized.
My mom's like, what did you do?

812
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:23,280
They got re baptized.
Mom, this is years back and

813
00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:24,680
she's like, that's that
religious.

814
00:43:24,720 --> 00:43:27,480
You've already been baptized.
And I'm like, yeah, mom, that

815
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,640
was for you.
This one was for me, you know,

816
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:33,000
so I wanted people to know that
I have a relationship with God,

817
00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:36,480
with Jesus.
And she's, she's kind of been

818
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,960
accepting of that.
But just last week we were

819
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:42,600
talking and she's like, you
know, I've been reading the

820
00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:45,520
Bible and been going to church,
been going to mass and I would,

821
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:49,040
it would be awesome if you
started going back to mass and I

822
00:43:49,040 --> 00:43:53,480
was like, mom, look, I, I have a
relationship with Jesus.

823
00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:58,200
You try not to cry again, but I
have a relationship with Jesus,

824
00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:04,240
mom, and you should be proud of
that because you're the one that

825
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:07,040
got that going.
You're the one that planted that

826
00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:08,920
seed in my heart from the very
get go.

827
00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:11,600
And now I have a relationship
with Jesus because of you.

828
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:14,160
All right, so I don't need to go
to Catholic mass.

829
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:15,680
I'm going to go where I damn
well please.

830
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:19,560
You know, so I'm, I'm proud of
the relationship I have with

831
00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:24,960
Jesus and I'm also really proud
of my family, man, because

832
00:44:26,200 --> 00:44:34,120
through it all, in my, in my
buzz, in all the confusion of

833
00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:40,080
being doped out of my mind for
seven years, I came through that

834
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:46,560
hell with the most perfect
person, you know, And I am proud

835
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,840
of my family and I'm proud of my
wife, man, because God, how did

836
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:53,680
that happen, dude?
You know, So, you know, and I

837
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:56,160
don't know if you, you know,
sick people seek sick people,

838
00:44:56,160 --> 00:45:00,360
you know, and I'm not, I can't
say that she's gonna listen to

839
00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:02,320
this.
But I didn't say she was sick.

840
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:04,920
But, you know, she didn't grow
it along the way too.

841
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:09,160
So she she might have been, she
might have been a, what is it

842
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:10,640
called?
A codependent.

843
00:45:11,040 --> 00:45:12,520
Codependent.
There you go, man.

844
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:15,600
She, she's never had a drug and
alcohol problem, but she she had

845
00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:19,960
a Kelly problem.
She liked to fix Kelly and that

846
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:21,720
she no longer has to fix Kelly,
man.

847
00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:23,800
So beautiful.
Yeah, that's those are the

848
00:45:23,800 --> 00:45:25,760
things I'm most proud of.
I'm proud of my relationship

849
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:29,880
with Jesus and I'm proud of my
family, man, because, dude, it's

850
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:33,880
just it's it's a miracle.
You know, I, I didn't even tell

851
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,280
the the story.
How you know, it's a miracle how

852
00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:39,840
we we met and we met and and
this is dude.

853
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:42,080
Have you ever been to Stockton,
CA?

854
00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:47,040
No, it's Stockton is like the
worst place for somebody

855
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,240
addicted, addicted to crack
cocaine to be.

856
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:53,080
It's terrible there.
So I was in Stockton in 2003

857
00:45:53,480 --> 00:45:55,320
and, you know, at the height of
my addiction.

858
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:59,840
And I remember we'd gone out the
night before and I, I was trying

859
00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:03,200
to talk to this girl and this
Mexican girl would come up to me

860
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:08,280
and she, he totally cock blocked
me and he like just holy, ruined

861
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:10,440
my game.
And she was kind of, she was a

862
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:16,000
little heavier set.
She was very vulgar and you

863
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:20,840
know, I was taken aback by it
and what I what I was doing that

864
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:22,800
night didn't happen because of
this girl.

865
00:46:23,320 --> 00:46:26,840
So the next night after the
game, we go out and if there was

866
00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:29,520
this we've been invited this
house party.

867
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:35,080
We go this house party and I
walk in and I see that same girl

868
00:46:35,080 --> 00:46:38,200
that had cock blocked me the
night before and standing next

869
00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:43,160
to her was this dark hair, dark
skin.

870
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:45,480
She had a short little Jean
miniskirt on man.

871
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:48,160
She was beautiful and she had a
beautiful smile.

872
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:51,920
And I wanted to talk to her so
bad, but there was this girl

873
00:46:51,920 --> 00:46:57,000
that was just had really ruined
it the night before and she was

874
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,720
with her all night and I finally
got the nerve to go over and

875
00:46:59,720 --> 00:47:02,560
talk to her.
And that was my wife, man.

876
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:07,640
We met in 2003 in Stockton, CA.
And that girl, it's name is

877
00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:09,560
Monique and that's her best
friend.

878
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:12,360
Monique's a stand up comedian in
LA now, man.

879
00:47:12,800 --> 00:47:15,520
But yeah, we met in Stockton, CA
and it was a long distance

880
00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:19,240
relationship for a while.
It's just, it's a miracle how

881
00:47:19,240 --> 00:47:22,360
everything worked out, man.
So proud of my wife, proud of my

882
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:25,440
son, proud of the relationship I
had with Jesus, you know?

883
00:47:27,240 --> 00:47:29,880
Kelly, what's the best way for
people to connect with you or

884
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:32,560
you want any social media
platforms or.

885
00:47:32,960 --> 00:47:36,720
The the only social media I have
right now, I, I, I'm on

886
00:47:36,720 --> 00:47:41,960
LinkedIn.
A long time ago it was I, I'd

887
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:46,920
had, I had Facebook and things
like that, but I realized like

888
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,720
it was more drama than, you
know, anything.

889
00:47:49,720 --> 00:47:52,680
So I've, I've limited myself to
LinkedIn, but you can find me on

890
00:47:52,680 --> 00:47:56,040
LinkedIn if you want to send me
a message or you don't want to

891
00:47:56,040 --> 00:47:57,880
talk.
It's just type in Kelly

892
00:47:57,880 --> 00:47:59,880
Gulledge.
You'll find me on LinkedIn So.

893
00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:03,880
And finally, Kelly, what do you
wish more men knew?

894
00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:08,280
What what I expressed earlier,
man, that the cause, like I

895
00:48:08,280 --> 00:48:11,520
said, when I was a kid and
growing up, that word repent was

896
00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:14,800
scary.
And it's never too late.

897
00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:17,240
You know what I'm saying?
It's never too late to do the

898
00:48:17,240 --> 00:48:18,840
right thing.
It's never too late to turn

899
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,840
around.
You always have an opportunity

900
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:23,520
until your last breath to turn
around.

901
00:48:24,520 --> 00:48:25,720
I don't always say this to
people.

902
00:48:25,720 --> 00:48:28,640
I know if I ever say this to
people, I am super proud of you.

903
00:48:29,480 --> 00:48:32,160
Thanks dude.
We we've just talked twice in

904
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:36,480
our lives.
You're such a genuine, grounded,

905
00:48:36,920 --> 00:48:39,720
real dude.
I'm amazed.

906
00:48:39,720 --> 00:48:43,440
You're making me cry, Andy.
I'm amazing you could ever be

907
00:48:43,440 --> 00:48:47,520
called an introvert, but yeah,
you were, you know, divine

908
00:48:47,520 --> 00:48:49,200
intervention.
You're blessed.

909
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:52,440
You're chosen.
You were meant to not just

910
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:55,000
survive this, but to thrive
this.

911
00:48:55,000 --> 00:48:57,240
Yeah.
Man, and just kudos to you and

912
00:48:57,320 --> 00:48:59,160
nothing but love for you and
your entire family.

913
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:01,960
Dude, I appreciate it Andy, and
thanks for giving me this

914
00:49:01,960 --> 00:49:04,200
opportunity.
You know, this is another way to

915
00:49:04,200 --> 00:49:05,760
give back, man.
So I really.

916
00:49:05,760 --> 00:49:08,120
Appreciate it man.
What an incredible journey for

917
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:09,760
Kelly.
From despair to purpose.

918
00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:14,280
Multiple times, Kelly reminds us
all that no matter how far down

919
00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:16,200
you might fall, you can always
come back.

920
00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:20,400
Redemption is always possible.
If today's conversation moved

921
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:22,520
you, remember you don't have to
go through life alone.

922
00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:25,600
Join me and other men committed
to living with authenticity,

923
00:49:25,600 --> 00:49:28,200
courage, and connection inside
my online community.

924
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:31,360
Authentic AF where the real
conversations can happen.

925
00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:36,760
Sign up at realmenfeel.org/group
and until next time, be good to

926
00:49:36,760 --> 00:49:37,160
yourself.