Episodes

My returning guest today is Dr. Avrum Weiss. Dr. Weiss is a psychotherapist, award-winning author, speaker, and teacher. His decade-long work on understanding the inner lives of men culminated with his recently published bestseller "Hidden in Plain Sight: How Men's Fears of Women Shape Their Intimate Relationships." We talk about what a man's lack of sexual desire means for a relationship and the root causes of that low desire. Learn what men are taught about sex that harms our relationships an...

For the first time, Real Men Feel is on location. This week's show checks in from Covenant House's Sleep Out in Boxboro, Massachusetts. Andy took part in a fundraising event for Covenant House that involved giving up his bed for one night to raise funds to get more young people off the streets. People choose to spend a night outside to help those who don't have a choice. We talk with Jill Vorndran, Covenant House's Chief Development Officer. Topics and Questions 2:59 - What is going on tonigh...

Real Men Feel hosts conversations that most men aren't having but that all men can benefit from. My favorite sort of guest is someone who shares their journey and how they are now serving people. That's what we have for you today. My guest is healer, coach, and men's group facilitator Justin Gagne. We talk about seeking more depth, being called to your purpose, loss, grief, anger, and recovery from alcoholism. Justin's experience in the darkness made him want to help others through that faster....

Right now, I should be volunteering at a New Warrior Training Adventure, a weekend event run worldwide by the ManKind Project. But a couple of weeks ago, Oct 11 to be exact, it was canceled by MKP USA. All the planned New Warrior Training Adventures, NWTAs, were canceled in the US for the rest of 2022. The cancellations were due to charges of cultural appropriation from a group of Native American elders called Spirit. First off, let me clarify that I am a middle-aged white American man. I hav...

#RealMenFeel ep 276 Gender Role Socialization | How Men Learn To Be Men Real Men Feel hosts conversations that most men aren't having but that all men can benefit from. Today we explore the ways we learn how to be men. Much of that comes from a life-long socialization process, specifically gender role socialization. My guest Dr. Bill DeFranc is a licensed psychologist who has worked in schools, hospitals, group practices, and college counseling centers and had a parenting consulting business. ...

Men are told it isn't good to fear things, but you can't be brave or courageous without first recognizing fear. And I've repeatedly found that great things happen when I walk boldly into my fear and do what I'm afraid of. I put out the call in the private Real Men Feel Facebook group for anyone interested in doing a regular guy chat - that means no agenda, nothing to sell or promote- an average dude who has something to share. I said, "If you are interested but terrified, that's a great sign t...

At one point in my youth, I left a mental hospital against medical advice because I had tickets to see Motley Crue. I figured if I was alive, I was going to that show. There's a longer tale about how I got home and the reaction of family and friends, but the net result is that I was kicked out of my house. I was homeless. Thankfully, I had neighbors who gave me a couch for a few days while I figured shit out, so I never had to live on the streets, but I thought that might be what happened. Th...

Real Men Feel ep273 No Lucks Given | Mental Health In The Kitchen Today Real Men Feel ventures into the kitchen to talk with Chef Brother Luck. Brother is an award-winning chef, entrepreneur, and advocate for the pursuit of self-discovery. He is on a mission to prove to others that while our past is forever a part of who we are, it does not determine the people we become. Brother has appeared on Chopped, Beat Bobby Flay, and Top Chef. He also owns two restaurants, Four by Brother Luck, and...

Real Men Feel reminds you that men are human beings and are entitled to feel and express the full range of emotions. I'm going to emphasize that more today, thanks to an email I received last week. "About 3-4 years ago, I came out as a trans man. I deal with a lot of imposter syndrome when it comes to my identity. Whenever I hear the name of your podcast, it makes me cringe a little because I don't see myself as a "real" man. It makes me feel like this is advice that isn't for me. ...does the...

Real Men Feel exists to remind you that men are human beings entitled to feel and express the full range of emotions. I look forward to the day when a man can cry in public, and people notice and say to themselves, "Now, that's a man." Not sarcastically, not ironically, but because they recognize that publicly expressing emotions could be the bravest, most courageous thing a man can do. Recently I got an email and the title was The Laws for Manhood. I rolled my eyes and marked it to follow. A...

Real Men Feel is about reminding men that they are human and entitled to feel and express the full range of emotions. Some of those emotions can you have feeling like absolute shit, but that never means that you are shit. If you've read any of my books, seen me speak live, listened to many Real Men Feel episodes, perhaps heard me as a guest on other shows, or even know me as an actual, physical, human being, you are aware that I don't hide the fact that I've tried to end my life multiple time...

This episode could be titled Real Men Fear. Today's guest is Dr. Avrum Weiss, a psychotherapist, an award-winning author, and teacher. His decade-long work on understanding men's internal lives culminated with his recently published bestseller "Hidden in Plain Sight: How Men's Fears of Women Shape Their Intimate Relationships." Avrum is a regular contributor to the Psychology Today website and offers workshops nationally about psychotherapy with men and helping men and women understand each oth...

Real Men Feel #268 Not Allowed to Die | Paws For Patrick My guest, Dan Maigler, shares his journey from politics to lobbying, to counseling, always knowing he wanted to help people. The kids that Dan works with reminded me of myself a lot. Some of the things they express resonated deeply with me. Fair Warning: This is an open conversation on suicidal thoughts and attempts. If you are in crisis, call or chat 988 right now. Dan is the mental health director for Paws for Patrick, a non-profit org...

Real Men Feel #267 8/19/22 Receiving Praise | Being Worthy Men One of the goals of this podcast, my books, and my coaching... is to be inspiring. But whenever someone tells me I'm inspiring, I'll try to deflect it. Some of that is humility, but at times I can also notice strong resistance, an outright rejection of the praise. I might even want to argue about it. -- which is ridiculous. This sort of experience showed up big time in my first guest appearance in about a year when I was on the In...

Real Men Feel #266 Moonshot Mission for Mankind & Humanity Research shows that men live sicker and die sooner than women. Dr. Jed Diamond is on a mission to change that. His moonshot mission focusing on men's mental health could save 375,000 lives each year in the United States alone. My Guest, Jed Diamond, is one of the world's leading experts in Gender Medicine and Men's Health. He has written sixteen books, including international best-sellers Surviving Male Menopause and The Irritable ...

Real Men Feel #265 8/6/22 Don't Always Push | 3 Life Lessons Over the past two weeks, I've done a lot of clutter clearing and overall cleanup. My home can get pretty nasty after ignoring it for over half a year, but I attacked the basement and garage today. I started with the basement, liberated the world's most ignored furnace filter, and then on to the garage - clearing trash, cobwebs, and random garage shit. I was sweeping the floor with a push broom — I pushed so hard that I snapped th...

Real Men Feel #264 7/29/22 Love You, Bro I could not always tell people I loved them, especially male friends. Love you, dude. Love ya, mean it. I love you, man -- are just some of the ways I've said and heard men expressing affection for other men. Recently, I've been talking with and getting messages from many friends I haven't spoken to in many months or years. I've noticed many signing off with -- Love you, bro. I've never been a fan of that phrase. I get that it is short f...

Real Men Feel 263 7/22/22 Reaching Out -- Being Ignored One thing that struck me after my 8-month-long withdrawal from life was how many told me that they noticed I was quiet and wondered what was up. Some said I'd been on their mind, yet they didn't reach out. Some said they energetically reached out but were quickly shut down. When I did finally speak up and share, the number of people who said that I'd been on their mind or that they considered reaching out but didn't… made me wonder wh...

Real Men Feel #262 7/15/22 Thinking I Want to Die WARNING: This episode discusses suicidal thoughts and attempts. If you are in a crisis, do not listen to this. Please call or text 988 to be connected to trained counselors that are part of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline network. If you are outside of the US, please search for suicide prevention in your country. You matter! Please choose life. In recent years, I've become more careful in referring to my suicidal thoughts and...

Real Men Feel #261 7/6/22 WTF Happened? Where Is Andy? This is the first episode of Real Men Feel since October of 2021. Such a long break was not my plan. Today I attempt to explain what happened and open up about my dark night of the soul and all the underlying shame that had me withdraw from everything. I've spent months living in complete apathy. I've only recently gotten to a place of genuinely wanting that to change. You can't help anyone who doesn't want to be helped. I did not want...

“So many of us grew up with male emotion just being an explosion rather than an expression,” says Charles Matheus, author and Mankind Project facilitator. In today's episode, Charles describes how men’s emotions are frequently neglected and explains how a different approach to emotions can give men powerful spaces to be fully authentic. Charles dives deep into a common masculinity trope: men who rarely express their emotions sober. Instead, men wait until they are inebriated and let their emoti...

“What is resiliency?” Andy Grant asks Resilient Culture Specialist, Jodi Woelkerling. Jodi is a coach and author who works with individuals and business leaders to help them build resilient cultures and individuals. In today’s episode, Jodi and Andy have a topical discussion about the importance of stress management and how it goes hand in hand with resilience training. Jodi explains her three-level process to helping her clients build resilience skills. She begins with level one, which highlig...

“Men are fixers. We think we need to know how to fix everything. I tell the men pretty much every week that we are not here to fix each other,” explains Alan Cantor, Spiritual Guide, Transformational Coach, and Founder of The Surround Men’s Group. Alan Cantor has dedicated his life to creating a vision for children to live in a better world, and that starts with men. He believes there are three core concepts to improving a man’s life – connection, trust and listening. Alan opens up about his fa...

“Change is a good thing,” says Rick Ornelas, Positive Change Expert, Author and Founder of I Spark Change. On this episode of Real Men Feel, guest Rick Ornelas explains the importance of maintaining a positive attitude, looking at life with a glass-half-full mentality, and acknowledging that change is not always a negative thing. Rick introduces the positive mindset of learning to adapt, grow and overcome obstacles, even if they are uncontrollables. He preaches about the insignificance of “bein...